Stand By Me
by oversizedchanel
Summary: CHAPTER SEVEN ADDED;; Take two boys, one car, and a whole road of possibilities. Nothing could go wrong, right? Takes place near the end of season 7. Officially Eric/Hyde. SLASH fic.
1. Stand By Me

He paced just like he always has

**A/N; Hey guys, I'm here with another fic. Don't worry, I'm still going to finish Dusk and Summer, I just got this really great idea and well, this is was happened. Dusk and Summer will be finished before this is but I'll juggle both of them, don't worry. It'll be switching between Eric and Hyde's POV, you'll be able to tell who's.  
**

**Anyway, this isn't much of a romance fic, though it will be thrown in there. Just read and find it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own that 70's Show or John Lennon or Popstars or any other major corporations mentioned in this chapter. **

He paced just like he always has. I've seen him do it a million times in the past who knows how many years. His fingers knotted together in anxiety and glisten formed on his hairline, heating up his cheeks. "I can't do this," he muttered for what seemed like the millionth time that evening. And for the millionth time that evening I told him he could.

"Hyde, I'm scared shitless." He dropped down onto the couch, burying his face in his hands. "I can't go to Africa. I was so stupid jumping into this." I leaned forward, our knees touching. "Foreman, you have to. How else are you going to get through college, huh? Don't you want to marry Donna, give her a good life? See, Foreman, this is exactly the part where you screw yourself over. So stop being a dillhole, and go pack."

His mouth opened to speak but before anything came out, the basement door opened, a shadow falling onto the walls. Her blond hair whisked behind her as she stepped into the room, biting her lip nervously. "Donna," he muttered, standing up. She looked at him in a sad way, in a pitying kind of way, and I felt as if I knew what was coming. "I'm leaving," I mumbled, getting up and going to my room.

The door remained ajar, their supposedly whispering voices drifting over my cot as I stretched out on it.

"Eric, listen, you're going to Africa and I'm… I don't know what I'm going to do. Do you remember when we wanted to get married and I basically forced us into that trailer and then you left? And remember when I kept saying that I really didn't want to leave Point Place? Well now you're leaving and… and I want to leave, too." It was silent and I could almost hear the cogs turning in his head. "What are you saying, Donna?" His voice slowly stretched across the feet from the basement to my small closet like room and I could sense the worry and fear in it.

"I need to leave, too, Eric and… You're coming back but I don't want to. Do you get what I'm saying?" I heard silence and then a loud thump, something hitting the round table. "Donna, if you're breaking up with me just do it." His voice was cold and instead of sadness, I heard fury. "Eric, come on, stop it." Their voices were louder.

"No, damn, Donna! Don't fucking sugarcoat it. It's just like the promise ring fiasco all over again. You know what you want, don't you? And I'm not apart of it am I?" She muttered a strained no.

"Donna, I'm not going to Africa." The proclamation sunk into her and in my minds eye, I could see her face, her humiliation, her disbelief. "Eric, you have to go, OK? You can't blow this off because of me…" "Sorry I forgot that you don't sacrifice for the people you love!" I never heard her yell like he did just then. "Just leave, Donna, OK? Have fun in Paris or where ever else you'll be." I heard a sigh, a slam of a door, of Foreman hitting something furiously, and then of him dropping onto the couch.

I sighed into my hands, waiting, anticipating. "Hyde," he called his voice miserable. I felt myself get up out of habit and walk to him, dropping back into the chair I occupied 10 minutes ago.

"You all right?" I asked, crossing my arms, looking at him behind my glasses. He shrugged and I saw his eyes redden, his fingers itch angrily. "I just can't believe it, you know? I was going to give up everything for her." I let him rant, let him yell and curse. I've been doing it for years, I was his emotional punching bag and I was OK with it. It felt nice to be needed and not to need someone, however much I pretended like I didn't.

I patted the quiet out of breath eighteen year old, but before I could speak, the basement door opened again. She stood there in a radiated beauty, her yellow sweater making her skin glow, her hair shine, her eyes dazzle. Eric muttered something about wanting some food, stalking up the stairs. The slam of the door and we were alone.

I knew what was coming. Marry me, or I'm going to Chicago. This stupid ultimatum crap that she pulled was driving me up a wall and I was in no mood to hear it.

"My flight leaves in a few hours, Steven," I heard her say, tearing myself from my own thoughts. "Did you… have you thought about what I asked yesterday?" I looked at her pleading eyes and I asked myself where would I be in 10 years if I stayed with her? I saw unicorns and children named Donny Osmend and me in a business suit and a picketed fence. On the other hand, I saw myself with the one woman who had always made me happy, who loved me for me, who tore down walls I didn't know I even had.

I sighed. "Jackie, I'm going to be honest. I don't know where we're going to be in a year. I don't know where I'm going to be in a year." "Steven, that's the problem! You can't live life by ear. You have to—"

"Jackie," I cut her off, shooting her a stern look. She silenced, looking up at me from under dark lashes. "I can't give you an answer because I don't know myself. That's the person I am and you knew that. I told you a thousand times. I will never be the perfect guy for you. I will never be the person that you dream up in fantasy or girly stories, OK? And I'm sorry but at the same time I'm not, because this is who I am. If going to Chicago will make you happy, then do it. If you think that you can go somewhere, which I know you can, then go, because I don't want to be the reason you're stuck in Shit Place until you're 45, thinking of what could be, OK?"

She searched the floor with wild eyes, she searched the ceiling also. She searched every inch of the basement expect for my eyes. "You're just letting me go?" she whispered quietly, shakily, finally reaching my eyes. I said nothing, merely looked at my shoes. I heard her sniff, huff, breathe deeply in attempt to hold back tears. I looked up to see her retreating back, and watched her pull the basement door open and step out into the stairwell, not even looking back.

And with face in hands, I knew I had just let go the best thing that would even happen to me.

* * *

I had never been one to turn to nicotine for comfort. Beer? Yes. Pot? Absolutely. Star Wars VHS? Every damn time.

But as the sun sunk behind us as we sat on the swing set of Point Place Park, I balanced a cigarette between my fingers as if I had been doing it my whole life. My too long legs dug into the dirt as I sat on the too small swing, Hyde sitting on the one next to me, also smoking up.

"She just thinks that because I'm leaving, I'm going to forget about her. That's bullshit. I would have waited years for her." Inhale. Hold. Exhale. "I knew it wouldn't have worked. I knew I couldn't have my dream job and Donna." A snort of laughter. "Now I have neither." Ash fell onto my fingers as I held the filter between my thumb and middle index finger. I dropped it into the dirt, crushing it with the heel of my shoe. Grabbed another one from the carton.

"Yeah, Foreman, it's tough luck," he said, flicking the lighter when I held it out to him. "It's like we do everything for them and we're still the lucky ones. We're the ones who won't ever get anything better then them." He threw down his filter in anger. "Dammit!" He buried his face in hands again. "She's always doing to this to me. How many times have I chased after anyone before her? None. But how many times have I dropped everything and ran after her? A zillion! And nothing I ever do is enough. Ever. And it never will be. Fuck it."

We sat there, our chests heaving in anger and sadness. "Foreman," he said his voice calmer. "We need to get out of here, tonight. We need to get into the El Camino and drive for days and never look back. Just you and me." I looked over at him. "Are you serious?" And he nodded. He wasn't drunk, wasn't high, just furious and upset.

"Yeah," I said, ideas suddenly dawning on me. "We need to show them that we're men and we can leave whenever we want. We don't need them to be happy, right?" "Right!"

We jumped off the swings, the cigarettes falling off his lap. "We'll go to… Florida, or something!" he said, his face excited, more excited then I've ever seen it. "I have a butt load of extra money since I started working at Grooves. We'll just take some beers and tapes and we'll just leave!"

I nodded my head. "And I… well I have absolutely no money, except for maybe like 20 dollars, but still, it's something! And who cares? We don't need a lot, just each other and the open road!"

Our plan seemed so right, so welcoming, such an avenue of pleasure on this drive of pain. Florida… I hadn't been there before, but I've heard that it was beautiful. Anticipation jumped through me as I thought of driving out of Point Place, out of Wisconsin, out of this hell that I created for myself, out of the place that always held me down.

"We have to go!" I said, nearly jumping up and down from glee. "If we leave in two hours, we can be crossing the Wisconsin border by 2 in the morning!"

It just seemed oh so righteous at the time. Too bad no one else would think so.

* * *

"No, no, no! Absolutely not!" Red's face was pink, spit flying from his mouth as he paced in front of us, shouting, yelling, lecturing. "How could you not go to Africa, Eric? I thought you were pulling it together! I thought you were finally settling down and all this high school crap would be behind you! And now you come and tell me you're going on a road trip?!"

Behind him, Mrs. Foreman stood at the kitchen counter, clutching her hands together, about to burst with happiness. She didn't care that we were going to Florida, she was just pleased her baby was staying home, away from evil Africa. I sighed angrily as Red jumped into another speech.

"OK," Eric said finally, clearing his throat, standing up. "OK. Listen, I gave up Africa and it was stupid and I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm doing about my future but that's why I need to go, to leave. I'll be able to sort these things out when I don't have you yelling at me, or Mom worrying about me, or Donna…" He broke off, and I noticed his usual twitchy manner act up again.

"Come on, Foreman," I encouraged gruffly. "Right, right, anyway. Once I've gone away from all that strain and pressure, I can figure out where I want to be and what I want to do. Please," he begged and I noticed for the first time how much he really wanted to leave. He always talked about it, never shut up about it, but I always thought him too much of a momma's boy to actually do it.

Red's face when from rage, to frustration, to confusion, to relief in a matter of seconds. "OK," he said finally, clapping his only son on the shoulder. "OK. I get it. You can go on this little road trip. But, if I have to bail you out of jail, my foot will be shoved so far up your ass…"

Mrs. Foreman cut him off, jumping on Eric, her arms around his shoulders. Then she ran to me, pulling me down in a deathly hug.

As soon as all was settled, as soon as Mrs. Foreman had collected herself, Eric said he was going to pack. Red ordered me to go check, double check, and triple check the El Camino, saying he would kick our asses if we broke down and he had to get us.

I stepped outside the glass door and made my way into the front yard, into the driveway. I stopped dead in my tracks. She stood leaning casually against the front of the El Camino, staring at the ground, in thought, clearly not aware of my presence. I coughed and scratched my chin, walking to her.

"I thought you were in Chicago," I managed to say through my shock. She looked up, her eyes wide. "I was but my Mom was gone and I… I just wanted to see if you maybe gave us a second thought." Her eyes looked hopeful and I felt her gaze cut through me. Even now, she looked sad and child like and I felt every inch of my being give into her, just like that summer in the hot basement.

"Jackie, you're constantly trying to change me. And you're never happy with where we are. When you dated Kelso, you constantly put him down and made him feel bad about himself. I'm leaving for a while with Foreman, and while I'm gone maybe you should think about what you want and when I get back tell me."

"Steven," she said impatiently. "I all ready told you what I wanted. I want to be with you, forever." "Are you sure, though?" I asked, looking down at her. "I mean, in a few years are you going to decide you want to run off and be a dancer or something? And I don't know what I want, I told you that all ready. And when I get back, maybe I will and then maybe we can talk about our futures together, but right now, you need to be on your way to Chicago, being on TV, doing what you want, OK?"

"I love you," she said, sliding her fingers through mine. "Just remember that when you're where ever you're going, all right?" She leaned up pressing her lips gently to mine and I kissed her back because she deserved that much from me. "I'm going to go to Chicago, and when you get back call me, yes?" I nodded, pulling her to me, enclosing her in my arms, my lips brushing the top of her head.

And then she was gone and I was left alone in the Foreman's driveway with my car. I ran my tongue over my lips, my eyes dropping shut as I felt the emptiness wrap around me. I welcomed it, just like I did those nights long ago when I sat huddled in my bedroom, waiting for my Mom and Uncle Strange Man to stop yelling.

The door slid shut and I opened my eyes, looking over at the porch. Eric stood there, his bag in hand. "Foreman," I said, sighing, walking to him, and clapping him on the shoulder. "If you brought any Star Wars or GI Joe toys, I'm kicking your ass." He opened his mouth to deny it before grumbling at me, turning back into the house.

I laughed and shook my head before following after him, telling him he could take as many toys as he wanted.

* * *

The sun was behind us as we peeled out of Point Place. As I leaned into my seat, Led Zeppelin III began, singing us out of town and I sung along, not caring that I couldn't sing in tune. Hyde sang too, his hands on the steering wheel, eyes determined from behind his glasses.

In the back seat sat muchie snacks, Mary Jane, beer, and a few changes of clothes. It was all we needed, all we ever really needed actually. We drove by The Hub, by the record store, by the Piggley Wiggly, past the 7-11, away from all of it.

Donna hadn't said goodbye, she hadn't even shown up, even though Bob was there. It hurt at the time, it made me mad and upset that she didn't even care. Who knew, maybe she was all ready booking a flight to Europe.

But now, with my hand out the window, my fingers catching in the wind, I didn't care. She could go eat snails in Paris, and fall in love with a million Italian guys, and write her soul out, but right now, I didn't care. I didn't care because I chose to not care. I was done putting my heart into everything for her and it never being enough. I knew I was the lucky one of the relationship, and she was never afraid to throw that around in my face. And that hurt. Its one thing when your friends say it, but when your girlfriend does, it sucks.

Before I could dig deeper into my brain about Donna, Hyde slammed on the breaks, jerking us violently forward. I steadied myself on the dashboard, looking at him. "What the hell?" He was panting from the adrenaline, his eyes shining as he pulled the glasses off his face.

"Look," he said pointing a finger across the window shield. I did and saw the 'You Are Now Leaving Point Place' sign. "When I start this car, we're driving right past that sign. And when we do, you will not mention Donna, think about Donna, cry about Donna, yell about Donna, or anything else that has to do with Donna, OK?" His blue eyes were narrowed sternly at me and I nodded.

"OK," I replied, turning in my seat to face him properly. "Once we pass that sign, you will not talk about Jackie, think about Jackie, cry about Jackie, bitch about Jackie, or anything else that has to do with Jackie, OK?"

We looked at each other and I saw his mouth twitch as he nodded in agreement. "Fine." He started the car again, slowly pressing on the gas as we drove past the sign. He stopped not even three feet from it and we looked at each other. And we laughed because that's what best friends do.

xxx

Half an hour later, we sang John Lennon, proclaiming that people needed to give peace a chance. We planned on being in Illinois by dawn, hopefully finding a hotel to crash in for a few hours before continuing on our trip.

"Hyde," I began, sipping at a bottle of soda, "where are we going when we get to Florida?" I saw him consider, thumping his fingers against the steering wheel in thought. "The beach," he said finally, looking over at me. "It's not like California beaches. You can find completely empty beaches all over the place, man. There are like dolphins and manatees just swimming around freely, it's really cool." He seemed excited, more excited then I had seen him in a long time.

"How do you know all this, when were you down there?" He slowed the car down, pointing to the carton of Marlboro's which I picked up, handing him one. I leaned forward and lit it before lighting one for myself. The smoke drifted above us, sliding out of the cracked windows.

"Remember in second grade when I was gone for almost half the year?" he asked me, inhaling the cigarette deeply. I nodded as I filled my own lungs with smoke. "Yeah, you said your mom got a job across state, or something."

"Yeah, well, that was a lie," he said casually, flicking the white ashes off his light. They drifted onto his shirt, onto the steering wheel, slowly floating out the window. I furrowed my brow, leaning forward and turning the radio down. "You lied?" I repeated and he nodded in conformation.

"I was down in Florida with my gramma and aunts while they put my mom in rehab for a little while. I didn't see her for months and it was OK. When they finally released her, we lived at my grandparents for a bit more but things just got worse with her." He sighed, smoke emitting from his nose. "She was moody, a lot more then she was usually. She got violent and yelled constantly. She wasn't drinking as far as we knew, but something about rehab really fucked her up.

"One day I was sitting at the kitchen table with my Aunt Diane playing Scrabble when my mom stumbled in, rambling about something or other smelling like shit. We ignored her cause she usually said stuff like this. But then she said my name so I turned and looked at her and before I knew it, she slapped me across the face and I was on the floor." He sucked hard on the cigarette, holding it in him as long as he could before slowly letting it out. "It was chaos. My grandpa came in and he was furious and my aunts tried to calm him and my mom down and… I don't really remember it much, but you know I was like what, 6? Anyway, they put my mom in the hospital for a few more months and she was diagnosed with severe bi polar disorder or whatever. They put her on meds and they worked for a while but when she stopped taking them, she lashed out.

"In the end, we ended up driving back home before summer started. She stopped taking pills and started drinking which surprisingly enough calmed her down. She didn't get as violent as she was before the pills. Occasionally, though, when I was older, we would argue and she'd throw some punches but you know, she usually didn't care enough and just took a beer and went away."

I listened to his sad story and pieces of our childhood clicked together. He was always a dirty boy, messy hair, old torn clothes. I remember once seeing a deep grey mark under his eye which looked as if he had attempted to cover it up with makeup. Another time there were finger marks on his arm, purple and dark. They scared me, but then I had remembered it was Hyde, he probably got into some fist fight or another.

"Hyde, man, that's awful," I said quietly, lighting up another cigarette. He shrugged, turning the radio back up. "Shut up, Foreman."

I grinned, knowing it was his little way of saying it was ok. I listened to the radio and a grin grew on my face as I started singing quietly.

"When the night has come and the land is dark and the moon is the only light we see…" I batted my eyelashes, my voice increasing in loudness. "Foreman," he warned brusquely, but it only egged me on.

"No I won't, be afraid. No I won't, be afraaaid. Just as long as you stand by me." "I will pull this car over and kick your ass…"

"DARLIN', DARLIN', STAND BY ME! OH NOW STAND BY ME!" I threw my arm around his shoulder, pulling him to my side. He squirmed, throwing me off him, glaring at me.

I continued singing the next verse softly and then shouting the chorus. He gave in, shaking silently with laughter, soon screaming the lyrics out the window with me.

"Darling, darling, stand by me."

* * *

"Sure you don't want me to drive?" Eric asked between a yawn. I declined his offer for the hundredth time that hour. "It's fine. We'll be in Illinois in two hours at the most." He nodded, snuggling deeper into the seat, wrapping his sweater around him as the night air slipped through the windows. A few minutes later, I heard a small snore and looked over, seeing that my companion's eyelids had soon drooped down, sleep taking over his small body.

Shaking the unwanted exhaustion off myself, I lit what seemed like my 15th cigarette that night. The carton was nearly empty and I made a mental note to pick up some more at the first Illinoisan liquor store I could find.

Eric had been in a John Lennon mood that day, so I left the cassette tape in as I plowed through boring cornfields and farms. 'Imagine' flowed beautifully out of the stereo. For as long as I'd known him, John Lennon seemed to describe Eric perfectly. For some reason, every song seemed like something he would sing, would think, would dream, would want. I considered what artist I would be and my mind automatically went to Zeppelin, Robert Plant, Jimmy Page.

As I thought more about it, I seemed to pair myself to the newest act on the musical scene, Robert Smith, what with his wildly insane hair. His lyrics were weird, symbolic, peaceful. I let these thoughts soothe me as the night swallowed my car, my soul, and my best friend.

xxx

.For some reason, I didn't put together that going to Illinois would mean going through Chicago, to the place where Jackie should be. I groaned and I felt the thin piece of paper that she left behind with Mrs. Foreman with her hotel name on it in my pocket. My eyes darted to the clock and I saw that it was nearing 2 in the morning, and Eric was out cold.

I ventured further into the bright city and while I drove, I dug out the paper from my jeans. 'Starlight Motel- Gurro Ave.' I passed street after street, knowing I wouldn't find it, that it was probably on the complete opposite end of town. And just before I threw the paper out the window, I saw Gurro Ave. glow brightly on the green street sign. Hesitating, I looked down at Eric. He wouldn't have to know. I would just say hi and leave… Maybe tell her that I really did love her?

Groaning, I felt my car turn onto the street and I caught myself looking for motels.

It soon appeared and I felt my head begin to ache. Starlight Motel.

Pulling into the parking lot, I left the radio on and quietly shut my door behind me, leaving Eric behind asleep. I cautiously walked into the main office and walked to the sleepy night desk lady. "Um, yes," I said to her lazy welcome and inquiries, "I was wondering what room Jackie Burkhart is staying in, I'm her boyfriend." She mumbled room 432 and I quickly left, leaving her to nap.

I counted the numbers down before stopping in front of hers. My hand was raised to knock, my heart pounding in my chest. I rapped on the door with my first. I heard her soft voice, telling me to come in.

"Steven?" she asked, sliding off the bed, pushing her magazine away. Her nightie barely touched her knees. It was thin and pink, barely concealing her skin underneath. "Hi," I said quietly, stepping forward. Before I could take her hand though, I heard a familiar voice and then a scream. I spun around, a half naked Kelso standing in my midst. I chased after him, grabbing his towel, watching him run bare ass through the parking lot.

I felt the towel drop from my fingers as I turned around and stared at her. "Steven, no, it's not what you think." I opened my mouth to speak but found no words, only cold fury raging through my body. The only thing I could do was shake my head and walk out. I heard her calls and my footsteps only quickened as I slid into the car.

Eric was awake, looking baffled. "Why the hell was Kelso running around butt naked?" he asked me, near laughter. I only stared ahead before leaning my head against the steering wheel. "Wait, what's going on? Why is he here? Are… Oh, Hyde!" he yelled and I looked up at him. "You fuck! You promised you wouldn't even think about her! And then you sneak down here?" Beneath his anger, I saw Eric's pity and it just angered me more.

Without speaking, I jammed the key in the ignition and turned it, revving the engine, slamming in reverse and out of the parking lot.

xxx

I could tell Eric was pissed off as he nibbled his Poptart, blue filling on the corner of his mouth. But he stayed quiet as the cassette played and the clock turned 3.

"Want to try this one?" I asked, pointing ahead to a Red Roof Inn motel. He shrugged so I took it as a yes and pulled into the parking lot. "I'll be back," I muttered, pushing my car door open and jumping out. The moon was faint at this point, barely giving light, exhausted from its hours in the sky. I made my way into the lobby and to the front desk, asking if a room for two was available. No, there wasn't, but a one bed was. I took it, near my breaking point, and pushed 20 dollars across the counter in exchange for two room keys.

Finally, I would sleep all this off.

* * *

The room Hyde found was small but cozy. I dropped my bag onto the small table and looked around. There was a small TV, a small bed, a small nightstand. It was like little people lived here. It would work though; I was too tired to care.

We changed in silence and dropped onto the bed, both of us exhausted. We lay next to each other, the silence filling the space between us.

"I'm sorry for going after Jackie, Eric," he mumbled from somewhere above my shoulder. I grinned up at him slightly and shrugged. "It's fine." "All right, cool." We slid under the covers as a draft sunk under the door and turned the lights off. I turned on my side, burrowing underneath the warmth, hiding my head in my pillow.

Just as I was about to drift off to sleep, I felt a tug on the blanket. It slowly slipped off me and I shivered. "Hyde, you moron," I muttered, grabbing a handful of the sheets and covering my pyjama clad self with it. "You're hogging all of it, Foreman," I heard from under a pillow.

"Hyde, I'll freeze to death long before you will!" He pulled the blankets back, wrapping himself in them. I groaned, sliding out of the bed, my bare feet padding on the carpet as I stalked over to the closet, opening it. I sought a comforter on the top shelf and hastily grabbed it, quickly tiptoeing back to the bed, and climbing in.

I buried myself in my blanket cocoon and I heard Hyde laughing quietly.

"Bitch," I muttered, cozying into bed and soon falling asleep.

xxx

The next morning I was awoken by the slamming of the door. I blinked sleep from my eyes and sat up, looking around. "Waz going on?" I muttered. Hyde stood at the door with two bags of groceries. "I got lunch," he muttered, setting the bags on the table. "Lunch?" I looked on the nightstand. 12:30 PM.

Wrapping a blanket around my shoulders, I walked to the table and dropped into a chair, my stomach rumbling. I watched as he pulled out a loaf of bread, ranch, cheese, and mustard. "I figured we could have lunch meat sandwiches, or something." I nodded my approval, reaching for two slices of bread, loading them with condiments.

"Wait a minute… Hyde, you forgot lunch meat." I looked at him, his mouth open in mid bite. "Dumbass!" I threw a piece of bread at him. He sat there, looking at his purchases, blinking slowly.

And then he laughed. I watched in disbelief as his shoulders shook and he rubbed his eyes under his shades. I soon joined in, looking at the ranch covered slices of bread.

"Eat up, Foreman."

xxx

After our interesting lunch, we checked out of the hotel and piled back into the El Camino, ready to continue our journey. He looked at the map as I rewound the John Lennon tape, sticking back into the stereo.

Soon we were off, down the streets of Chicago. "Dude, I don't think I've seen so many nudey bars in one town," I said in awe, looking out the window. "Wait until we get to Florida. I was too young to remember, but my cousin has told me about tons he's been to down there. He said they're first class man." We laughed at our own pervertedness.

"So, Hyde, if you lied about being across state when you were really in Florida, what else have you lied about?" I questioned, opening the fresh box of Marlboro's and sliding two out. He continued looking at the road, taking the lit cigarette when I handed it to him.

"Remember when I told you I was going to Michigan for the summer in the fifth grade?" he asked me, taking a puff. I nodded my head. "I was really in North Carolina for my mom's wedding."

"What?" I coughed through a haze of cigarette smoke. "Your mom got married again?" He lazily flicked the smoke and shrugged. "She thought she was. We went down there for this crappy quickie marriage and then it was back home. Well, after the rehearsal dinner, her fiancé caught her fucking his brother. Dude totally freaked out and shot his brother in the arm, it was insane. Her fiancé went to jail and when his brother turned out to be fine, he took my mom back to his house in Alabama for the rest of the summer. Turns out he was married though, so we left by the time school started."

I watched as he inhaled and I mimicked him. "Why didn't you ever tell me the truth? We were best friends." "Eric, I was a kid, I just listened to the lies my mom told me." We sat in silence. "You've really had it bad, huh?" I asked.

He shrugged. "It doesn't matter. And if you go Donahue on me, I'm kicking your ass," he threatened as we turned into the freeway. I smirked and looked out the window. Cars raced passed us. The sky had turned a deep grey and soon enough, plump pellets of water fell on our windows.

"Shit," I heard him muttered, quickly rolling his window up. I followed suit. Leaning back into my chair, I put the cigarette out and curled my legs up under me, resting my head against the window. Lennon sang, Hyde smoked, and I slept.

* * *

Reviews would be lovely!


	2. Your Song

**A/N: Hey, here with chapter two. I'm not sure where this is going, really. I'm still in debate about weather making is a slash Eric and Hyde fic, but I know not a lot of people are into that. I'm kind of a secret forbidden shipper. Shh, don't tell. But this is more for me so even if I do make it a slash fic and I don't get any reviews, I'll probably still keep writing because I just love it. **

**But I'm not making any decisions right now. Just give me your honest opinions about what you think about this chapter, about the previous chapter, and about my slash idea. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own That 70's Show or Elton John.**

* * *

I shifted in my seat, my ass starting to hurt from sitting still for so long. We had been driving for nearly 5 hours now, closely approaching the Kentucky border. Eric sat anxiously in his seat, his camera in hand, wanting to get pictures of every state we visit. I laughed to myself at his dorkiness.

"Hyde," he said, leaning into his bag, fumbling around. "I have a surprise for you." His grin was unreadable but I knew it was something I would hate. He pulled a tape free of his back pack and rewound it, shoving it into the cassette player. He wiggled around excitedly, waiting for it to begin. "OK, OK, here we go!" I watched as he turned the volume knob up and leaned back into his seat.

Before I knew it, the familiar piano notes played softly from the radio. "Foreman," I warned, narrowing my eyes. "No," he whined, "don't ruin it." He cleared his throat and before I could stop him, took my hand and began singing.

"It's a little bit funny this feeling inside. I'm not one of those who can easily hide. I don't have much money but if I did, I'd buy a big house where we both could live." I tried to pull my hand free so I could frog him but he held it with a deathly grip. I saw his mouth twitch.

"And you can tell everybody! This is your song! It may be quite simple but now that it's done… I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind, that I put down these words, how wonderful life is now you're in the world." He batted his eyelashes, his face red from containing his laughs. "OK, Foreman, I get it. I'm a fox, but I don't swing that way."

"SO EXCUSE ME FORGETTING, BUT THESE THINGS I DO! SEE I'VE FORGOTTEN IF THEY'RE GREEN OR THEY'RE BLUE! WELL YOU SEE THE THING IS WHAT I REALLY MEAN, YOURS ARE THE SWEETEST EYES I'VE EVER SEEN!" "They're blue!" I yelled over him and radio and he burst into tears, his body shaking from laughter. I joined in too, unable to control myself.

"I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND, I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND THAT I PUT DOWN THESE WORDS! HOW WONDERFUL LIFE IS NOW YOURRRRRRR IN THE WORLDDDDD!"

We finished the song, panting and out of breath from shouting and laughing. "OK," I said, catching my breath. "Throw that shit away." He pulled the tape out and held it to his heart. "Elton is the king." He put it back in his bag. "Now, what does Hyde want to listen to? And I swear to God if you say Zeppelin I will kill you. That's all we ever listen to." I smirked slightly as he talked of my love for the rock gods.

"Mm, how about some Stones, yes?" He considered. "Yes, Hyde, that sounds great," I said for him, raising an eyebrow behind my shades. He grinned, reaching into his bag, pulling the tape out, rewinding it, and putting it in to play.

We leaned back in our seats, trying to get as comfortable as possible. "Get the cigs, yeah?" He pulled them off the dashboard, pulling the lighter from his jeans. "God, I've really fucked you up, haven't I?" I taunted his readiness to light up. Eric merely shrugged, slipping one between his lips and lighting it, handing it over to me.

"So, I've told you two stories now. It's your turn." I held the light in between my fingers, shooting him an expectant glance. He shrugged in thought. "Well I don't have any, erm, interesting stories like you do, Hyde dear."

"Mm, that's true; I keep forgetting you're dull." He stuck his mouth out in a pout and glared. "Do too. It's just none of them involving me." I laughed, shaking my head. "All right, tell me something I don't know."

"Well, last winter Kelso, Fez and I were standing out by the 7-11 and Fez dared Kelso to lick a pole while it was snowing and he did. So of course it got stuck and this wasn't like in third grade either, it was really stuck. It was his whole tongue, not the tip. So then Fez pulls this Swiss army knife out of his pocket and we tried to like sidle it between the pole and tongue but we ended up scraping off the whole top layer of his tongue skin. So then I ran into the 7-11 and bought a thing of salt because I remembered that salt melts ice and we tried it, but his tongue was like bleeding so he started screaming when we put the salt on. So after that I bought a lighter and we eventually melted him free."

We were shaking with laughter and the image of Kelso screaming while Fez and Eric poured salt in his mouth stayed in my head. "Why didn't anyone tell me?" I asked, gasping for air. "Oh, that's because Kelso told us not to because you bet him 20 that he wouldn't be able to not get his tongue stuck on a pole that winter. I was going to burn him and tell you but I forgot."

"Bastard owes me 20 bucks," I mumbled and we cracked up again.

"Hey, look, we're getting closer to the Kentucky border," Eric said, perking up, grabbing his camera off the floor where it had lain forgotten. I rolled my eyes and followed his orders to slow down. He pressed down on the button and the clicker shut and he looked pleased.

"Want to get some food?" I asked, pulling off the highway. He nodded and our stomachs rumbled with hunger.

xxx

45 minutes later, we sat on the flat bed of my truck on top of a small hill overlooking a lake. It reminded me slightly of Mt. Hump and I think that's why Eric asked to eat here. Our burger wrappers lay forgotten on the ground and I watched as he reached for his fourth beer. I was on my second, not wanting both of us to be plastered.

He was quiet, the quietest he had been so far aside from when asleep. But it was peaceful as the wind blew slightly over the water, causing slight ripples and small splashes. The evening was coming to an end, the moon soon beginning its awakening.

Eric threw the can over his shoulder and stumbled off the truck, walking around the grass. "Careful there, pal," I called as he kicked rocks with his shoe. He ignored me, picking up several stones, throwing them as far as he could, and we watched them land in the lake, splattering water around the bank.

"Hyde," he said, his voice shaking from the alcohol. "Red's been right all these years. I am a dumb ass. I'm a dumb ass let down of a son, a friend, and a boyfriend slash fiancé. What am I going to do with my life?" He kicked another rock. I bit my lip, knowing he didn't want a response, only wanted to ramble drunkenly on. But I swore to myself that I wouldn't be afraid to punch him if Donna's name came up.

"It's like all these years I've only been making it by, only been just barely living. I always thought that once I turned 18, everything would fall into place and it didn't, Hyde, it didn't." His voice was louder and I saw him spin around, his face slightly green. He moaned, rushing to a bush, bending over and retching, and then vomiting.

I sighed, setting my beer down, walking over to him. "Come on, man, chill out." I took his arm, pulling him back, but he ripped himself free with more force then I knew he had. He spun around and I saw wet underneath his eyes. "

"I'm serious. I'm not going to be able to do anything with my life. I feel so stuck, so held down. And then whenever I try to do something about it, I realize that it's me. It's me holding myself down. And then I don't know how to stop it, how to let go. And then I realize I don't know what I'm supposed to let go of! My parents, my friends, D-Donna…" I pitied him too much at that moment to frog him.

He dropped onto the dirt, hugging his knees, burying his face in his arms. I watched him sniffle and cry and I made a note to myself to never give him beer again. I sat down next to him, pushing my glasses on top of my head, looking out over the lake, letting him snivel.

Kentucky was nice. It was peaceful with lots of free land and nice air. I didn't want to smoke for fear I would ruin its smell.

I heard Eric sigh, his shoulders sagging in defeat. I stood up, taking him by the arm, leading him back over to the truck and sitting down on the edge of it. He rubbed the back of his head painfully and sighed, slowly falling backwards, closing his eyes. I watched him for a moment before stretching out next to him.

"I'm sorry, Hyde," he mumbled. "It just sucks lately." I nodded and gave him a quiet it's OK. As we sat there, I looked above at the sky, watching the stars and moon. "Hey, Foreman, I bet Luke's up there fighting a space battle right now. Or nailing Leia, probably." He merely groaned and I sighed in defeat, letting him soak in his own pain.

I closed my eyes also, allowing the night breeze to flutter across my skin, enjoying it, welcoming it. After a minute, I felt warm fingers take mine and I looked over at Foreman, whose eyes were still closed.

So I held them back and I didn't even want to kick his scrawny ass because he was too drunk and it felt nice. I didn't even mind when he snuggled his head against my shoulder and soft snores spilled out of his mouth. I merely sang Elton John to him under my breath and let the night take us over.

* * *

The air outside was still and hot and our asses were stuck to the seats. My head ached from a hang over and I'm pretty sure I said and or did some stuff the night before that I shouldn't have because Hyde seemed uptight. I tried to shrug it off, to not think back to it, to just fight off the awkwardness.

I had forced him to let me listen to my Elton John tape. It took lots of hitting, and yelling, and whining but I finally won. Sinking deeply into the seat, I whispered the words under my breath, my eyes searching out the windows, taking in all of the scenery.

"Forman, are you deaf? Hand me the carton of cigarette's in front of your face." I tore away from the window, from my thoughts and looked around. I mumbled an apology, taking the Marlboro's and lighting two up, slipping him one. We sat in silence, killing ourselves in one of the most pleasurable ways imaginable, breathing in the smoke and exhaling slowly, savoring the dry taste each hit gave us.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I asked sweetly after the first round of cigs had been extinguished. He shrugged in his usual nonchalant manner. "I'm just tired." And it showed. His eyes were dark even behind his glasses and he slumped slightly over the steering wheel.

"I can drive, you know. I've slept like, what, half the trip?" I offered, actually really wanting to drive, missing my Cruiser terribly right then. "Because I trust you oh so much?" he said darkly, rolling his eyes.

"You should," I said, slightly offended. "Come on, man, I'm not fucking Kelso, for God's sake. I know how to drive. You even taught me how to drive. In this exact car. Please, it'll be fine." He groaned. "You're lucky I'm tired," I heard him say before pulling over on the side of the road.

And so, with a satisfied smirk on my face, I slid into the driver's side of the El Camino and buckled up. "You had better wipe that smart ass grin off your face before I do it for you," he threatened grumpily before closing his eyes and leaning against the window.

I didn't, pleased to have a steering wheel under my fingers again. Pulling back onto the road, I managed to light another cigarette and balance it between my fingers as I drove cautiously.

His heavy breathing soon accompanied Elton John. My thoughts scrambled around the place, and I found myself breaking my promise to Hyde before leaving Point Place. I figured I had some credit on him because he chased after Jackie, so I felt only a little guilt as my mind drifted to her.

It hurt a lot to think that she was most likely all ready replacing me. Throughout the years, it had become both apparent that we would be together forever or that nothing good could come out of it. Such a confusing relationship we lead but we were happy for the most part, aside from her moments of disgust at something or other I did wrong. I think that's what hurt the most. I put a lot of effort and heart into things I did for her and they were never enough, never good enough. Someone always seemed to do it better.

I sighed, smoke escaping my mouth. I shouldn't think of her anymore. And I wouldn't because I promised. Rewinding the Elton John tape, I kept my focus on the road while my companion slept away.

xxx

"Hyde," I whispered yet again, poking his side harder. He stirred slightly and I thought had finally awoken. Snores filled the car seconds later. Glaring, I turned up the radio and screamed Tiny Dancer in his ear.

I thought he was going to punch the shit out of me. "What the _hell_," he shouted, his eyes wild from sleep.

"Good, you're up," I said calmly, turning the radio down again. He looked at me furiously, his brow furrowed. "What could it possibly be that you had to wake me up with that crap?"

I pointed in front of us. "'Farm Girl's Gone Wild,'" he read, looking back over at me. "Nice." Grinning I nodded, fumbling around for my wallet. After checking to make sure I had some singles, we jumped out of the truck, walking excitedly into the first nudey bar on our expedition.

The lights were low and hay was strewn all over the place. It looked as if the show had just started because women were as fully dressed as strippers could be. They all wore similar outfits: plaid shirts, tied tightly under the chest, and short Daisy Dukes.

After heading to the bar and getting our drinks, we walked to a table in front of a pole and sat down. Hyde shot me a grin. "Thank you so much for waking me up. This is so much better then my dream." I laughed, downing half of my beer. "Oh, Forman," he said, looking sternly at me, "get drunk again and I'm throwing you on the curb, got it?"

"Um, OK, I'll try," I sniggered, pushing my mug away. Soulful country music started playing and before we knew it, a blond dancer with blond pigtails had wrapped her legs around the pole, slowly sliding down it, her eyes on me. Hyde had all ready jumped out of his seat, sticking a dollar bill down her shirt. She winked in thanks, spinning around, her hair flowing with her.

I sighed, clinking drinks with him. Tonight would be a good night.

xxx

I felt goosebumps rise up my chest and shivered, curling up tighter. I went to pull my shirt closer around my body when I noticed I was grabbing at bare skin. Sitting up, I nearly cricked my neck as it swung about, attempting to gather my surroundings. The room was dark and I felt hay in my hair and underneath me, irritating my skin. I blinked a few times, adjusting to the dim lighting.

Hyde sat across from me, his head buried in his arms, his chest heaving slowly from sleep. I pushed him hard, whispering his name. He grunted, looking up and me, his hair messy, messier then usual. "Wassgoingon?"

I shrugged, shivering again. "What happened? What time is it?" He looked down at his watch. "It's 3 in the morning," he yawned, standing up, stretching. He was still fully clothed.

"What the hell happened to my shirt?" I hissed, glaring at him, daring him to shout burn.

"I honestly don't know."

Rolling my eyes, I stood also, reaching into my back pocket for my wallet, only finding it not there. "Did you take my wallet?" I asked, looking up at him. He merely shook his head, searching his own pockets. "Dammit."

"We were robbed," I gasped, bouncing from foot to foot in fear and from the cold. "Settle down," he growled, slipping his jacket over him. "I'm not a dumb ass like you. I left the rest of our money in the car." I sighed in relief. "Let's just get out of here, OK?" I was creeped out, relating everything to some cheesy horror flick, not wanting to be the first to die. But of course I would be. The skinny one always was.

Hyde grabbed my arm, dragging me out the room, into the dark hallway. I looked up at him with wild eyes but he merely pressed a finger to my lips, jerking his head. I strained my ears, finally hearing soft voices.

"Mm, only 20 bucks on the skinny boy," I heard. It was the stripper who danced for us. I remember her taking me to a back room. I was too drunk to count my money so I had told her where my wallet was, giving her permission to take what I owed her. I groaned, leaning my head against the wall. The footsteps neared us and Hyde yanked me out the door.

I fumbled in my pockets, relieved the keys to the El Camino were still where I left them. Our shoes crunched against the gravel parking lot as we ran to the car, quickly jumping in, our chests pounding, out of breath and panting. I jammed the keys in, starting the car and plowing out of the parking lot, speeding down the road.

"That was awful," I squeaked, 5 miles away, and now following the speed limit. He merely shook his head. "I'm picking the next strip joint. And for punishment for almost getting us involved with the whore mafia, you're driving for the rest of the night while I sleep."

I deserved that much.

* * *

I shifted in my seat, groaning as I stretched, opening my eyes. I blinked against the morning sun, quite stiff from my night of sleeping in a car. I looked over at Eric who was fighting sleep, blinking rapidly every few moments. He looked over at me when he heard my movement. I saw bags dark under his eyes.

"Oh, good morning sunshine," he snarled in a not at all welcoming manner. I grinned slightly, leaning back in my chair. "If you don't want to drive all night, then don't risk our lives, yeah?" He only grumbled in complaints but I brushed them off.

I wasn't as hammered as Eric was, I remembered some of the night before. I remembered the blond stripper in front of us, Lula, taking him by the hand, taking him behind a curtain, out of my sight. Before I could go to his aid, though, a tan woman dropped into my lap and well, Eric was soon out of my head.

He had returned long before I was done, collapsing shirtless onto the chair at the table we sat. He was still drunk and I noticed vomit on his mouth and grimaced, wondering what that poor stripper had to hear.

I barely remembered anything else, having fallen asleep an hour later after paying Mary Lou the farmer's daughter.

I had to admit though, Eric had shown more balls then I had seen in him in ages. I was surprised he even considered going into a nudey bar without my persuasion, pride rising up in me.

My thought bubbles popped as Eric's voice drifted through the car singing Crocodile Rock.

"Forman, I worry about your sexuality sometimes." His face merely reddened and he turned the radio up, sticking his tongue out, singing louder. "If I drive can we change the damn tape?" I yelled.

Before I knew it, we were pulled over and he was nearly dragging me out of the passenger seat. My grin wasn't hidden as he curled himself up like a cat, soon dropping into sleep a mere 2 minutes after I began driving again.

* * *

Ok, kind of short, I'm sorry. But just tell me what you think.


	3. Tangerine

**A/N: All right, I think it's going to be a slash fic. Sorry if you don't like it, but the cuteness is too strong to deny. I don't think it's going to be like most slash fics out there, though. I'm not going to have a lot of smut in it, just adorableness and awkwardness and I dunno. Just Hyde and Ericness. So hopefully you guys will continue reading and I can bring a little change onto this Hyde/Jackie filled board. :P**

**Disclaimer: Don't own that 70's Show or Led Zeppelin.**

The town of Nashville glowed as we drove down the street. It was like a huge festival going on; vendors selling items in carts, people laughing, singing, dancing. Unknown bands played on platforms guitars in hand, cowboy hats on head.

I bounced in my seat in anticipation and Hyde barked at me to stop twitching. I ignored him, my eyes scanning everything they could, taking in everything. I clicked my camera, recording everything to take home, to show everyone.

"Hyde, look, it's Castle!" He nearly slammed on the breaks, and went into reverse, parking in the lot behind the famous recording studio. We looked up in awe at the huge studio, our jaws nearly falling on our laps. I thought about all the famous musicians who had recorded there, who had created history. I clicked my camera and he didn't even yell at me.

"Man, this place is awesome," he breathed once we had our fill and began driving back down the street. "Elvis freaking walked down these streets probably, Hendrix played shows here, Johnny Cash did too." He was nearly as excited as me, probably even more though he didn't show it. I hid my smirk before he could see it.

"Hey, look, why don't we get some grub at that diner?" I suggested, pointing to a 50's themed diner called Bob's. He shrugged, pulling into a parking spot. "Forman, leave the camera here."

I waited until he had left before sticking it under my arm, hopping out also.

xxx

I sipped my beer as the classic jukebox music played over our heads, our dinners finished. "Well, I don't know about you," I said, looking over at Hyde, "but I want to stay here tonight." He nodded in agreement. "Yeah, definitely, let's find a show to go to or something. And no," he added, narrowing his eyes at me, "not a strip joint."

I left the tip at the table and we climbed out of our booth, heading to the door. "Let's walk," I said, noticing all the shops and such still open. The air was cool and welcoming, making us shiver only slightly in its presence. The streets were busy but not loud. Lights shone everywhere, but it wasn't blinding.

"Hey, look," he said after a moment, pointed over to a music shop. It sold records, concert tee's, posters, and anything else music related. We crossed the street and I held the door. "After you milady." He frogged me; I followed in after.

I thought he would have a heart attack. There was a whole isle dedicated to Led Zeppelin; tees, records, imports, posters, even coffee mugs. I grinned as he soaked it in, digging in a box of tapes.

I turned on my heel, walking along the aisle, my finger dragging along the edge of the cassettes. I saw the 'J' section and skipped over to it, flipping through eight tracks, locating Elton John. I nearly gasped in delight, pulling a limited edition 'Goodbye Yellow Brick Road' record free. Bouncing on my feet, I saturated every inch of it in.

"Forman if that's Elton John I'm kicking your ass and you're walking back home." I turned around, clutching the record to my chest. His eyes darted to it, rolling.

"Look what I found," he said, his sudden disgust evaporating. I watched as he pulled it open, revealing a large photo/poster of Led Zeppelin performing here in Nashville, ten years earlier. He peeked over the edge, his grin wide.

"Fine," I said, tucking the Elton John record under my arm. "You can buy it if you let me buy my _limited edition 'Goodbye Yellow Brick Road' record_." He contemplated and I saw him looking longingly down at the poster.

"All right, all right," he mumbled, rolling the poster back up. We walked over to the counter, setting our purchases onto it. The cashier looked up from his magazine. "All done, boys?" he had an accent but was clearly… a bit flowery. He wore a tight sweater vest with pinstripe pants, thick bracelets on his wrist. He clicked his tongue, his eyes going up and down me.

"Well, hello there," he whispered. I froze, unsure of what to do, of how to react. I felt Hyde shake slightly with laughter and I looked up at him, glaring. "Uh," I said. "Hi."

The cashier picked the record up. "Wonderful taste," he purred, ringing it up. He put it into a bag, pushing Hyde's poster away, leaning forward into my face. "So are you from around here?" His breath smelt like mints, sharp and cold against me. I merely stammered. "I could give you a tour, you know."

Before I knew it, Hyde had grabbed my hand, holding it up for the cashier to see. "Sorry, he's mine." My eyes widened more, if possible, as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder.

"Y-yeah," I muttered, leaning into him comfortably. The cashier shot us a disgusted look, huffily ringing up the poster, shoving it into another bag and pushing our items back across the counter. Hyde took them, slapping some money down, and flashed the cashier a smile, pulling me out of the shop by the hand.

We ran down the street, the plastic bags flailing behind it. His fingers were still curled in mine as our feet pounded against the cement, as we rushed away from the cashier.

"OK," he said, stopping. "I think we're fine." His voice cracked as he laughed, pointing a shaky finger at me. "You should have seen your face!" I leaned against the wall of a laundry mat, rubbing my fingers in my eyes, sighing. I felt him next to me, still laughing, and I leaned over to punch him, a grin spreading across my face. "Thanks, _boyfriend_," I said, creasing my nose in distaste.

He merely shrugged. "You should be thanking me otherwise that guy would have taken you home and raped you all night." I punched him again.

"Knock it off or I'm going to hold arms with you and skip down the street, you fuck."

* * *

Cigarette smoke filled the room and empty beer cans sat on the table. I sat across from him, my feet propped up on a chair. He fumbled a light between his fingers, his lips occasionally kissing it for smoke.

We had found a record player in the closet, oddly enough, and he had put in the Elton John record without taking no for an answer. "Forman," I said, exhaling slowly, "I'm afraid this trip is making you independent. Who am I going to be able to boss around now?" He merely grimaced at me and shrugged. "What's wrong with you?"

Another shrug. "Shrug one more time, and I'm breaking your shoulders." He simply sighed and stood up, fumbling around in his bag. Moments later, he pulled out a small brown baggie and tossed it over to me. I grinned, taking the paper out, all ready rolling up a joint.

He flipped the lights on dim and we sat on the floor across from each other. I took the first hit and sighed in pleasure, handing it to him, our fingers touching. I watched as he closed his eyes, filling himself up, letting everything out.

"I'm not gunna lie, man," he said, nodding his head to the record, "I'm going to get really fucked up tonight." I grinned at him, assuring him it was fine with me, he needed to get fucked up anyway.

He sucked on the joint in agreement.

xxx

"Forman, seriously, chill out!" He was laughing and crying at the same time, both high and trashed at once. I sighed, picking him up under the arms, laying him comfortably on the bed. "I'm hungry," he moaned and I brought over the pizza box that I had ordered half an hour earlier. He dug into it as I pulled a carton of ice cream from the freezer, extracting two spoons from their wrappers.

We sat on the bed going through the pizza and ice cream alike. He had crumbs and sugar stuck to his face, but I don't think he cared at the moment. The food had calmed him down a bit, his tears finally coming to a stop.

I flipped the TV on, going through channels and finally stopping at Rocky. He smiled happily, curling into a pillow, throwing his pizza crust to the side. I picked up the pizza remains, wiped up drippings of ice cream, tossed spoons in the trash.

After brushing crumbs from the comforter, I slipped my shoes off and fell onto the bed next to him.

"I'm cold." I looked over at him but he had his eyes closed, his hand resting on his stomach. I pulled the blanket out from under him, dropping it on top of him. He curled up under it. Shaking my head, I focused back on the TV.

"My stomach hurts." "Then go throw up in the…" I heard him retch. "…bathroom." I groaned, leaning over him, pushing his hair back. He panted and I thought him done, but then his body convulsed, his stomach tightening under my arm, and pizza spilled from his mouth again. I felt his forehead sweat, his chest heaving, and he finally leaned back into me. I handed him a napkin.

After settling him back down, I picked a towel up and dropped it over his mess, spraying the hotel air freshener over it. I heard him laugh and I looked over to him. He had his hand pushing his hair off his forehead and he was watching me.

"No more drinking for you on this trip, Forman." He only shrugged, slipping out of his jeans and crawling back under the blanket.

xxx

An hour later, the TV splashed light onto his dark sleeping face and I found myself watching him, his chest rising and falling gently. I flicked the bangs off his forehead and leaned back against the pillow. He stirred slightly, turning on his side, curling up. His eyelids fluttered open slightly and he looked up at me. "Can you turn the TV off, it's hurting my head." I nodded, reaching for the remote, pressing the off button, dropping it back at the foot of the bed. "Thanks," he murmured, his eyes falling shut again.

I grinned slightly, finally sliding beneath the sheets, falling against the pillow exhausted. I felt him move slightly next to me and I looked down, finding him looking up at me.

"Thanks, Hyde. I'm sorry for getting drunk so much." I laughed quietly, shrugging, closing my eyes. "Seriously though, man, I love you. You're awesome." I heard him slur slightly in his speech, realizing he was still drunk. "I love you, man," he repeated quietly, his eyes falling shut again.

"I love you, too Forman." He sighed, his fingers brushing gently against mine, soon grabbing them. He moved closer to me, leaning against my chest as he slept and I felt my own arm resting on his waist, securing him. I sighed into his hair, wondering if maybe I was drunk, or if maybe this was a dream.

Well if it was a dream, I decided, then it was a good one.

* * *

The next morning I awoke with warm arms around me. I looked up, the top of my head gently touching Hyde's chin and my brow furrowed in confusion. I slipped out of his hold and out of the bed. My feet touched something squishy and I looked down. Oh God. I was standing on a towel, but I had a feeling of what was under it; the pain in my head confirmed it.

Stepping over the mess, I searched for my bag, locating it on the table. After rifling through it for a moment, I pulled out a bottle of aspirin and a water bottle, quickly opening both.

Once I had swallowed the pills, I picked up the cigarette carton on the table and Hyde's lighter. I was about to slip them in the back pocket of my jeans when I realized I wasn't wearing them. Shivering slightly, I picked them up off the edge of the bed, slipping quickly into them, and then packing them up with my necessities.

I quietly opened the door as to not awaken him, and slid out, shutting it carefully behind me. The sky outside told me it mustn't have been any later then 8 in the morning and I quivered with cold under my thin thermal shirt.

I walked down the sidewalk, out past the main lobby, and out the hotel entrance, finding myself on the nearly empty street. I took out a cigarette and lit it, smoking and walking slowly.

The events of last night of unknown to me and I wondered what could have triggered Hyde to… grope me. I rubbed my forehead, thinking that maybe he was drunk too, or perhaps he did it accidentally while we slept. I sucked on the cigarette, pushing it from my mind, and continued gazing around the beautiful town of Nashville.

I passed the music shop that we had gone into the night before and crinkled my nose slightly, personally glad it was closed. Some shops were open, but only a few, but I finally found a quaint little bakery. I put the cigarette out before stepping inside, taking in the fresh smell, reminded slightly of home.

The woman behind the counter welcomed me cheerfully. She looked young, maybe only a few years older then I. She had long brown hair which was currently twisted into two separate braids, the tips brushing her collarbones. She had a pale face with freckles and deep blue eyes that seemed to glow with every word she spoke. I smiled warmly, dropping my gaze to the baked goods, considering what Hyde would want.

After settling on two apple fritters, I also ordered two cups of coffee. The woman prepared my order, while I rummaged though through my wallet, thankful Hyde had given me a few dollars, just in case he said. I set my money on the counter in exchange for my food and mumbled a quiet thanks to the cashier, taking the bag and two coffees, carefully stepping out the door.

The walk to the hotel was quiet and peaceful, people seeming to just be getting up from last nights fun. I ducked into the corridor that held our room and put the bag of doughnuts in my mouth, fumbling for the key card.

I pushed the door open and stepped into the fresh air conditioned room. Hyde lay stretched out on the bed, flipping through channels, his expression sleepy.

"Hey," I greeted, setting the food onto the table, pulling the cigarettes and lighter out of my pockets and back onto the table. I heard him mutter a welcome and Fantasy Island began on the TV. I tossed him the bag of apple fritters and took our drinks over to the bed, handing him one. I sat next to him, crossing my legs, and we watched TV in silence, eating.

"Um, so I guess we should get out of here soon, huh?" I asked, draining the last bit of coffee from my cup. He nodded in response, sliding off the bed. "I'm going to go change; why don't you pack up what's lying around?" I agreed, standing up, and beginning to gather what was ours.

I had just zipped my bag up when I heard the clatter of something on the bathroom tile and Hyde shouting fuck. I skidded across the room and pushed the half open door open. He stood there, the saddest look I had ever seen on his face. I followed his gaze down to the floor and saw his beloved sunglasses broken into two.

"Oh, man," I said, putting my hand on his arm. "It's OK." He looked up at me, his eyes wide in shock, seemingly unsure of what to do. "Hey, we can get you some new ones, all right?" I felt like my mom and the way she would soothe my tears when my action figures would break. He bent down, picking the shattered pieces up in his hands, looking sorrowfully down at them. I watched as he folded them together, putting them in his pocket. His Zen mannerisms kicked it. "Let's just get out of here."

xxx

I sat in the driver's seat slowly maneuvering through the mess of traffic. Hyde sat next to me, arms crossed. I felt awful since his glasses broke; he'd had them since he was 12. I had even taken my Elton John tape out and put Led Zeppelin III in.

I threatened the scream Tangerine if he didn't cheer up, so he frogged me in the arm, but I thought I saw the ghost of a grin. I settled for that.

"We're almost in Georgia," I said conversationally. When he didn't speak I started humming 'Devil Went Down To Georgia', earning myself a glare.

"Come on, Hyde, we'll get you new glasses, I promise." He just stared out the window, shrugging his shoulders, trying not to care, even though I knew he did. I could tell he felt weird without having his shades on his face or hanging off the collar of his shirt. I complemented his eyes, noting how now everyone else could see them.

"Forman, please, just let it go." I bit my lip, focusing back on the road as Zeppelin continued playing. 'Tangerine' ended and he replayed it over. I gave him a quizzical look which he ignored.

"This is one of the best songs on the record," he said finally after a few minutes of silence. I nodded in agreement. "One of my favourites." We sat in the music, letting the words wash over us with contentment.

"Do you mind if I sleep? I'll drive tonight." I nodded, "Yeah, sure man, that's fine." He sighed graciously, turning his shoulder to me, drifting off. I sat listening to the same song over and over until I knew every note and knew every word and I liked that feeling.

I lit a cigarette and rain began dropping along the windows. Its pitter-patter soon fit the drums in the song and I found myself singing quietly under my breath as to not wake Hyde.

A few moments later, though, he stirred slightly and I heard him muttering words under his breath. My singing faltered and I turned the radio down, my attention slightly diverted by his voice. He was quietly cursing under his breath, his fingers clenching into fists, the skin around his knuckles turning white. I grabbed them, pressing his fingers open, quietly saying his name over and over, but he merely cursed louder.

"Hyde!" I shook his shoulder, touching his temple, trying to wake him. He moaned, turning to face me, his eyes still closed. "Fuck!"

"Hyde, wake up man!" I squeezed his hand tightly, nearly digging my fingernails into his palm. His eyelids flew open and he sat up, looking wildly around. "What's wrong?" He looked down at our hands which were intertwined and I nervously pulled mine away. "Are you ok?" I asked. "I think you were having a nightmare."

His face darkened and he shrugged off my statement, muttering an 'I'm OK' and reaching for a cigarette. I watched him light it and I noticed that his hand was unsteady as his fingers balanced the light.

I cleared my throat subconsciously, unsure of what to say. "I'm fine, Eric," he said before I could speak, and I noticed his use of my first name. "A-all right."

The car went quiet, and his breathing returned to normal, and the carton of cigarettes became low and I was confused, knowing that my best friend was lying to me; I didn't like the feeling, I didn't like it at all.

* * *

I let Eric think I was sleeping, but in actuality I had my back turned to him, my eyes closed, and my thoughts in the most recent nightmare. Ever since we began driving down these same roads, the memories of that night down poured on me and it made me shake, something that I would never admit out loud.

Her body laid twisted, her chest heaving, sweat dripping down her face. And he sat in a sick mirth, a grin stretched on his face. I blinked, trying to rid the image from my mind's eye but it stuck, just like it stuck for years after it happened. I felt my stomach tighten and I closed my eyes tighter, willing myself to not think about it.

I sighed, turning back around, opening my eyes as if I had just awoken. The sky outside told me I had been "sleeping" for over an hour, and I noticed Eric getting twitchy. "Are you OK?" I asked. He gave me a perplexed look. "You're fidgeting."

He shrugged. "I'm just hungry. We should be in Atlanta in an hour though, so I guess I can wait until then." I nodded, watching the water drip down on my window, the rain somewhat slowing down. "D-Do you want to talk?" he hesitated.

I groaned, turning to look at him. "Forman, I tell you a lot…" "No you don't!" he interrupted. "OK, I don't. But I do tell you more then I tell most people, and you do know more about me then most people. But right now, I really want you to shut the hell up and drive."

"That means you'll tell me later," he said smugly. I frogged him, ordering him to keep his eyes on the road.

xxx

We had found another motel. I was starting to enjoy them kind of and it felt nice being here with Eric. I noticed him watching me carefully throughout the rest of the drive and even through dinner, which we had at a small diner. It angered me slightly, but I found it a bit endearing. He was always worrying.

That night we sat on the hotel bed watching reruns of Quincy. I hadn't allowed him more then two beers and I refused to tell him why, but he accepted it, smoking cigarettes instead. I made him buy them this time, seeing as he had started smoking them more then I had. It was quite comical.

"I'm going to go change," he said through a yawn, jumping off the bed and taking his bag into the bathroom. I figured I should do the same, so after shuffling through my bag, I found my pajama pants and a plain black tee shirt, changing quickly.

I heard the bathroom door open and he stepped out, clothed in his overly baggy pajamas. I made him swear he wouldn't sleep nude on the trip, a promise he thankfully stuck by.

We fell back onto the bed exhausted, and Eric flipped through channels, landing on Smokey and the Bandit. We watched in silence for a few moments and I felt him fidgeting next to me, like he did in the car. I ignored it, shifting under the top blanket, curling my knees to my chest, resting my head on my hand.

"Hyde," he said finally, sitting up and turning the TV down, "can you please talk to me now?" I sighed, and turned around, propping myself up as I lay on my side. "What do you want to talk about, Forman?" He narrowed his eyes at me. "You know what I want to talk about."

I considered before falling against the pillow, lying on my back. I felt his eyes on me, expecting an answer that I really didn't want to give.

"Fine," I said eventually, "fine." I heard him sigh through his nose and lay down next to me, silently expecting. I didn't know where to start, what to say, how to say it. I felt my heart jump a little and I cringed at the unexpected nervousness of it.

"When I was 13, my mom had this boyfriend. I don't even remember his name, and I don't want to. He was a bit weird but for a while I thought he actually liked my mom unlike every other guy she met, who just wanted a quick fuck." I coughed and scratched my nose, not sure of how to continue.

"OK, what about this guy?" Eric encouraged quietly, patiently. "Well, he was from Florida. Remember when I told you that after my mom found out her ex-fiancés brother was married and that we went right home? That's not exactly what happened. I don't know where my mom met this guy, but it was sometime during the wedding planning down in Florida. Once the wedding was called off and her fling was over, she went back to Florida, back to this guy. We stayed at his house for a while but my mom knew she'd have to get back up to Wisconsin sooner or later. So her friend said he'd take us. He was really nice and sweet to my mom, seemed to really care about her, bought her anything she wanted.

"So we're in his van one night which we slept in because we couldn't afford a hotel and it had a bed and it was fine. Well I'm sleeping in the front seat and I wake up and…" I broke off, taking a breath, unsure of how to keep going. Everything up to this point was seemingly easy. I would have to relive it, go back to it, be in that same car. I would have to describe every limb, every scream, every shout.

I must have seemed nervous. I felt Eric's fingers take mine and this time I knew he wasn't drunk, but I let him hold them.

"When I woke up, I looked into the back. It was dark and I called for my mom. She had been sleeping next to me in the drivers' seat but she wasn't there. So I call her name and for a moment I don't hear anything. But then there was this rustling noise and a sound like someone was crying. So I flipped the light on and I looked around and my mom was sitting on the floor and…" I swallowed roughly, pressing my eyes shut, groaning. Why was this so hard? "She looked like she'd been through a tornado, man. She had bruises everywhere and cuts and her lip was bleeding. Her clothes were ripped and she was crying. And next to her sat that guy, laughing at her, cussing at her, calling her a whore. And then he saw me and I was so scared, I jumped out of the car.

"He followed me and soon grabbed me, his hand around my mouth. He dragged me back to the car and threw me next to my mom. The next day I was back home and my mom was in bed for weeks." I shuddered slightly, feeling bile coming up my throat, but I hurriedly swallowed it down. Eric's thumb was moving carefully over mine and I looked over at him. He was staring at the ceiling, his eyes wide and face pale.

"I guess being back here reminded me of everything. I don't know why I didn't put it together, you know? I should have remembered…" I mumbled. "Hyde, its fine. If you want to drive back home, we can, it'll be OK."

We turned to face each other and I saw slight panic in his eyes. "No, man, its fine. I guess I was just kind of freaked out." I tried to hide it, tried to muster as much Zen that was left in me, but I found it hard. I buried the side of my face in my pillow, closing my eyes and sighing in relief. "I… I actually feel a little better now," I said.

"Thanks for telling me all this, Hyde," I heard him say. I shrugged against the mattress, feeling exhaustion sweep through me, thoroughly drained. I heard Eric move, flipping the lamp next to him off, and sigh, moving under the blankets. His breathing became heavy and I could tell he was asleep.

His fingers still held mine.

* * *

So, yeah what do you think? Reviews, please! :D


	4. Beautiful Boy

**A/N: I appreciate my faithful readers, and welcome new ones. This story has been added to favourites quite a bit, but it'd be cool if you dropped a line. No warnings really, just cuteness. This won't be a dirty smutty fic, just a 'dorable one. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own That 70's Show or John Lennon or anything else mentioned here. And yes, The Don Cesar Beach Resort is real. I visited it once and it's fucking gorgeous and pink.**

* * *

My fingers were sticky with sweat as they held fast to Hyde's. I remembered taking them last night and holding them throughout sleep. It felt nice and I liked the fact that he didn't recoil or kick my ass. But now, as I looked at our fingers meshed together, I wondered what it meant. I wondered why it felt so natural to hold his hands in between mine, why I liked it, why I wanted him to never let go.

"Just because you want to hold my hand doesn't make you homosexual." His voice was gruff, heavy with sleep. I lifted my eyes to his, heat rising up my neck. I stammered. "I didn't say anything."

He had a sneer on his lips, the one that told me he knew what I was thinking. He still didn't let go of my hand.

We lay on our backs, looking up at the tiles on the ceiling. The clock told us it was 10 in the morning and we were only halfway through Georgia. I was so excited to get to Florida, so exhilarated for Hyde to show me the lay of the land. My thumb had begun moving over his, just like it did last night and I felt him sigh happily.

"Why aren't you kicking my ass?" I asked, turning my head slightly. He shrugged against his pillow, his eyes meeting mine. "For holding your hand?" he asked and I nodded in reply. "Because it feels nice."

"Eric, you know me," he went on, his voice scratchy and rough, "and yet you still hang out with me. I trust you."

I trust you. I relished in those words, feeling warmth spread through me. "I trust you too, Hyde," I muttered, my eyes falling shut. He held my hand tighter in response.

We lay in the quiet and I felt myself falling back to sleep. Hyde moved next to me, and I felt warm lips against my palm, and then air.

xxx

After lunch, we checked out of the hotel and he took the first driving shift of the day. I put an AC/DC tape in and we tapped our feet to it. "Why is it raining so much?" I complained as water fell from the sky, a slight whine to my voice. He shrugged, muttering something about the time of year.

"Florida won't be like that though, don't worry," he assured me and I believed him. I fiddled with my cigarette, ash falling onto my jeans. I wanted to talk about last night, I just didn't know how to approach the matter, how to bring it up without him hiding away.

"Eric, we don't have to talk about my mom anymore. I said all that was in me last night." I looked at him, eyebrows raised. "How do you do that?" He grinned in an innocent manner, "What?" "You know exactly what I'm thinking." A shrug of the shoulders. "You're not very hard to read."

I didn't know if I should have been offended or not. I took it as both, and curled deeper into the seat, looking over at him.

"What are you looking at?" It was my turn to grin and shrug. "Nothing, I just want to talk to you." He groaned. "You're such a fucking woman, Forman." I frowned, puffing at my cigarette. "Am not."

He laughed slightly. "What do you want to talk about?" he turned down the radio. "Everything, tell me everything."

He took a breath, looking at me, glaring. "Fine, ask away." I grinned, satisfied. "Hm… Did you sleep with Pam Macy that night of the prom?" He threw his head back, laughing. "No, God Forman I'm not Fez." I grinned at his response.

"OK, OK. Did you really like Donna a few years ago?" He fell silent, shooting me a look, "I told you you're not allowed to talk about her." I shrugged. "I'm not. You are." He sighed, scratching his chin. "Yes, I did. I did since middle school and I was going to ask her out, but you beat me to it. And here we are."

I fell quiet. "I'm sorry," I mumbled, but he laughed. "Man, it's all right. She's not right for either of us, anyway." Sighing, I nodded, knowing he was right, but not wanting to. "Next question?"

I wracked my brain, picking out one that I had been dying to know for ages. "Do you really love Jackie?" This time I thought he was going to punch me, but he merely pointed out that he wasn't allowed to talk about her either. "You can for now."

He rolled his eyes, agitated. "Yes," he said after a minute, "I did." "Did?" "Did. Jackie, she's always trying to make me be someone I'm not. It's like she has this perfect little world inside her head that she thinks everyone else has to believe in. But it's never reality." He was ranting now, heating up, angry. "We're too different. And at first that was hot, that was cool, it was a nice break from every other girl. And maybe one day when she got her head out of the clouds, we would have ended up married. But she pushed me and I don't like being pushed, you know that!" He huffed, thumping his fingers on the steering wheel. "It's over between us, though, I decided that."

"Why did you tell her to wait though, Hyde? She thinks she has a chance." He sighed. "I thought we did too, but I don't know, I finally got to think on this trip and she's not what I want." He met my eyes for a moment and I felt my heart speed up.

Coughing, I scratched my nose. "OK, OK, no more Jackie questions." He gave me a grateful look. "Um…" I was hesitant about the next question, but I knew I wanted to ask it. "Are you glad you live with my family?"

He tore his eyes from the road, looking at me. "Of course I am. Otherwise I'd be living alone eating ketchup off of crackers. Eric, do you remember the day you came over with a sandwich for me?" I nodded my head, swallowing hard.

"You were, like, the first person that showed any interest in helping me. Most of those other guys, my other "friends", just wanted drugs, but you actually wanted to be my friend and you wanted to hang out with me and that was… nice. And then you wanted me to hang out in your basement with your friends, and I don't know, I guess I knew you were really my best friend then. And your mom, and even your dad, actually cared about me. Your whole family is like Mr. freaking Rogers. Even Laurie is like the sister I never had."

I blinked, "Why are you opening up to me so easily? I thought I would have to like get you wasted first." He grinned. "Didn't you hear what I said this morning? I trust you. And you asked and I dunno, I guess I owe you that much." I smiled, looking down, blushing slightly. I felt nervous and jumpy and I didn't know why. I felt like I was invading in on him, but at the same time welcome.

"You're such a girl," he muttered, smiling slightly. I fought back with an 'I'm not' and he dropped it.

"Anymore questions?" I thought and then shook my head, "But I'll probably think of more later." He seemed content with that, and turned the volume of the radio back up.

"Forman," he said a few minutes later and I looked over at him. He hesitated. "Do you think when we get to Florida we could, I dunno, maybe stop off at my grandmas?" I grinned slightly and nodded, "Yeah, that'd be cool. You could introduce me to everyone." He grinned back, an excited glint in his eyes.

I now figured out why he hid behind his glasses. He could display any emotion on his face despite what was inside, but his eyes always gave him away.

They always gave him away.

* * *

"Eric," I whispered in the dark car, looking over at my sleeping friend. "Eric!" His breathing sped up and he sat up, his hair sticking out in every direction; I grinned. "We'll be in Florida in 10 minutes; I thought I'd wake you up." His grin was visible even in the dark and he bounced impatiently on the edge of his seat.

"Are you excited?" he asked in a sleepy whisper. I shrugged but inside I was thrilled. The scenery was all ready changing underneath the street lights, familiar and comforting.

I turned up the radio and Eric's ears perked up. "Are you listening to Elton John?" "Erm…" I thought he would piss his pants in excitement as he sang along. Shaking my head, I joined in under my breath.

"Look," I said, pointing my finger to a spot 2 feet ahead of us. He dove into his bag, rustling out his camera and clicking a picture of the Florida welcome sign.

Sighing, he settled back down in his seat. "I'm tired," he complained and I couldn't argue. I had been driving almost the whole day and my stomach ached with hunger. "I don't think we'll get to my grandma's tonight, so it'll have to be another hotel," I mumbled, driving onto the off ramp and off the freeway.

We kept our eyes peeled for a hotel, ready to settle for the first one we saw. I heard Eric's stomach grumble over the music and he blushed, wrapping his arms around himself.

xxx

The empty McDonald's bags lay on the ground and us on the bed. I held the phone in my lap, fumbling around in my wallet for the familiar slip of paper with the number. Eric sat next to me, legs crossed, twitching in anticipation.

"Ha," I said, pulling it out, laying it flat on the bed. My tongue between teeth, I carefully dialed the number and pressed the phone to my ear, cradling it underneath my shoulder. "It's ringing," I murmured to him.

"Hello?" It was a gruff unfamiliar voice and I felt my spirits drop. What if they moved? It's been over five years; they probably live somewhere else… "Hello?"

I cleared my throat.

"Um, yes, is… is Judith there?" I heard the man on the other line sigh, shuffle the phone.

"No, son, she's not. Judith Cree has been dead for almost four years now."

My heart sunk into my stomach, and I felt the phone slip through my fingers. I managed to hold it in a sweaty grip, stammering for my words. "O-oh, all right, thanks anyway." The click on the other line rung through my ears, but yet I still held the phone.

"Hyde?" His voice was somewhere near my shoulder. "Hyde?" I felt him taking the phone from me and my hands dropped on my lap. His voice questioned the phone before he finally set it down. He shook me. He begged me.

I cleared my throat. "She passed away." I looked over at him, wishing I had my glasses now more then ever. I saw his face fall, pity etched on every inch of it and I wanted to hit it off. "Its fine," I said before he could speak and I shrugged. "Honestly, it's OK."

He didn't look convinced. "Hyde, it's your grandmother, it's not OK." I felt his hand on my arm and I pulled away, flopping backwards against a pillow. "What do you want me to do, Forman, cry?"

"Yes," he pouted, falling down next to me. I grinned and turned on my side, looking at him. "Seriously, it'll be fine, all right? I mean…" I picked at the blanket uncomfortably, "it would have been nice if they would have called us or something, but you know whatever." I looked back up at him. "Stop feeling sympathetic for me, Forman, or I'll kick your ass."

He grinned slightly. "You're allowed to be sad in front of me. I know how you bottle things up, but you don't have to." He pressed a finger to his lips. "I won't tell." I laughed and I felt something rise up in me. I didn't know what it was at first, but then I remembered. It was the feeling I got before I kissed a girl for the first time. I furrowed my brow, swallowing hard, trying to shake it off. But I wanted nothing more then to grab his hand again.

"Are you OK, man?" he asked, looking curiously at me. "You look like you're going to be sick." I just looked at him for a moment, unsure, frozen, and fucking scared.

"Eric?" I asked nervously, "would you hold my hand?" He blinked and I thought I saw his mouth twitch. He sighed, looking back up at the ceiling and I felt his hand move towards mine, my fingers soon tangled with his.

"Hyde, is it bad that I like this?" I heard him mutter and I could only shrug in response. "Is it bad that I don't want to not like this?"

He turned his head and looked at me, confused. "What?" I just laughed, holding his hand tighter.

I closed my eyes and we lay in silence for a few moments and I felt the anger of the previous phone call slip away. I felt him move next to me, flipping the lamp next to him off, engulfing us in the dark. "Are you going to sleep?" I asked.

In reply I felt his lips on the side of my mouth, soft and warm. I turned my face toward him, pressing back against him, tasting him. He tasted like cigarettes and the crappy coffee we had picked up at the gas station that morning. He tasted like sweetness and everything good in my life and I didn't want to stop kissing him even though it was wrong and I should be kicking his skinny ass for this, but I didn't want to, I just wanted to keep my mouth to his forever.

He pulled away and we looked at each other in the dark, his eyes shining with a million questions. "Don't say anything," I muttered and he asked me why. "Because you'll ruin it."

* * *

Oh. My. God. Oh. My. _Fucking. _God.

What the hell is wrong with me? Why did I kiss him, why? And why did I like it and why do I want to go it again and why…

I felt him move in his sleep. Sighing, I turned on my side, my back to him and went over the evening.

After we kissed, I laid back down. I felt him letting go of my fingers and I knew he was as scared as I was, I could tell by the way he said goodnight. But he had obviously liked it, because he kissed me back and that's what confused me more.

I thought about Donna. She still was attractive. I thought about Charlie's Angels and they still turned me on. I thought about Hyde and God, I just wanted to hold his hand and kiss him all night.

What. The. Hell?

Am I gay all of a sudden? I mean, in high school it was a stupid joke that I was gay, but I mean, I didn't think it was true, Donna didn't, none of my friends did.

My heart was pounding a thousand miles per hour in my chest and I thought I was going to puke, My head ached and the room spun around and part of me wanted Hyde to beat me up so I wouldn't do it again and another part wanted him to kiss me all over.

I groaned into my pillow, hiding away my confusion and aches.

xxx

The next morning I woke to find Hyde sitting on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands.

"Hey," I said, stretching. He looked at me and nodded, "Hey." "You OK?" I asked, curling under the blanket against the morning air. He shrugged which I took as a yes. "Oh."

He stood up and walked around awkwardly, unsure of what to do. "Hyde," I said, sitting up, my hands falling into my lap. "About last night, I'm sorry… It was stupid." He turned around and looked at me. "Oh, yeah, definitely."

He avoided my eye, walking to the other end of the room. "Wait a minute… You liked it didn't you?" He spun around, glaring at me, ready to beat my ass.

Instead he sighed, walking over to the bed and sitting next to me, facing me. "Why did you kiss me?" he asked simply. I struggled for an answer, nerves rising in me. "I… don't know," I mumbled somewhat lamely. He looked disappointed.

"I mean, it was just this feeling in me and I was nervous and I couldn't stop myself." Oh God, I sounded like an idiot. I buried my face in my hands and groaned. "It's OK," he said, "I know what you mean." I looked up, "You do?"

"Eric, do you want to kiss me again?"

This had to be a trick question. He couldn't be kidding me. Of course I didn't… did I? "If you don't, just say no and we'll pretend it didn't happen." I wanted to say no and put everything behind us and I had opened my mouth to do it.

"And if I do want to?" He smiled slightly and leaned forward, catching my bottom lip between both of his and I tasted the same wonderful taste as last night. I felt my hands resting on his shoulder and I sighed happily into his mouth.

We broke apart and I felt myself fluttering inside, nervous, just like the first time I kissed Donna. "So what now?" I asked. He bit the inside of his lip in thought and I found it absolutely adorable and before I could stop myself, I flew at him, kissing him again. He laughed in my mouth, taking my face in his hands. "That's what."

And he kissed the life out of me for an hour.

xxx

He didn't hold my hand when we left for the car and I was glad. I was so nervous and new at this I didn't even know if that was allowed.

"Do you want to go talk somewhere?" he asked me as I started the car. "You want to talk?" I asked slowly and he nodded his head so I agreed. He gave me directions to the freeway that I would take for 30 minutes and then I would get off on San Clarita Ave.

His fingers held mine and he sang Elton John to me as I drove and I found it hard to pay attention to the road and I wanted nothing more then to pull the car over and kiss him again.

"Get off here," he said gently, pointing a few lanes over. I cut a few people off and drove 5 miles over the speed limit to please him, merging as fast as I could on the off ramp. He guided me through the beach city, past the busy streets, past the dillholes on bicycles.

10 minutes later we pulled into an empty parking lot and I peered out the window and down the hill of sand to see an empty beach. We slipped out of our seatbelts and shut the car up and I felt myself nearly skipping down to the water. He threatened to kick my ass if I didn't stop freaking out, but I ignored him, and was soon lost in a world of sand.

I stopped breathless at the beauty of the water. It was clear blue with white foam and clean sand and the ocean met the sky just like a painting and I felt my heart racing. Hyde pressed his finger into my back, edging me forward and I followed him to a huge rock that jutted out over the sea. He sat down, his feet dangling over the edge and I joined him, my own legs crossing Indian-style. "How could your mom ever want to leave this?" I breathed, looking up into the chaste sky, free of smoke or smog. He laughed quietly. "I know it was awful when she said we were. I could live here forever."

"Then why don't you?" I asked, looking at him. "Because then I wouldn't be with you." "I would come with you," I protested. "No you wouldn't. I know that you like to say you'll leave Point Place forever, but I know you won't, Eric. It's your home and you love it and you can't deny it." I fell silent and I knew he was right.

"Anyway," he sighed, shifting into a more comfortable position. "I don't think I answered your 'what now' question properly, did I?" He looked at me, his eyes light and cool, the exact colour of the water. I felt myself blushing slightly and he laughed.

"Eric," he said and I savoured the way he said my first name, "You're my best friend. And when we were kids, I knew I would never want to be without you and even now I know that. I don't know what's going on right now and I'm kind of scared and I don't know if I'm gay or what, but you will never seize to amaze me."

He leaned forward and kissed my smiling mouth.

"That didn't really answer my question though," I stated, narrowing my eyes. "It's because I don't know the answer," he said. "Well do you like me?" I asked, and he nodded his head, smiling at my bluntness. "Well, I like you too. And I think we should be together."

He brushed my bangs from my face, running a finger along my jaw line, smiling sadly. "Yeah, I know, but it's not that easy. People are going to give us hell, you know." I dropped my gaze and nodded, somewhat disheartened. "But," he said, holding my chin up, "I think we can fight through it."

"Really?" I asked and he nodded reassuringly. "I'm scared, too," I admitted shakily. "I don't know why this happened, Hyde, and I don't know why you give me these feelings but, God," I stammered, "they're so much better then the ones Donna or any girl has given me."

He thanked me with kiss and we turned back to the sea. I knew that if he wanted to swim across it, I would do it with him.

* * *

"Hyde?" I heard him whisper in the dark hotel room as he lay next to me, "are you my boyfriend now?" I smiled at the innocence of his voice. "Are we dating now?"

I looked down and our eyes met in the dark. I brushed his forehead with my lips. "Don't say dating—that sounds weird. We're being together." He held my hand tighter. "OK, I like that."

"God, Forman," I said, pulling him closer to me. He asked me what and I didn't know how to respond. "I love you." The words spilled out of my mouth before I could stop them. "You what?" he asked, propping himself up, looking at me.

I coughed. "I love you." He smiled slowly and I felt his lips on mine, muttering 'I love you, too' inside my mouth. I slipped my tongue between his lips, roaming around his teeth, brushing the roof of his mouth. He sighed, pulling away, curling against me again. "Will you turn the radio clock on?" he asked and I couldn't deny the sweetness in his voice so I did it. John Lennon sang over us and we laughed quietly.

He pulled the blanket up to his neck, kissing my neck, his breathing becoming steady. I sang to him and I knew I would for the rest of my life even if he didn't want to hear it.

xxx

We were at the beach again. It was late, just nearing night time but we didn't care. Eric loved the sand; I knew he would be happy here. And I wanted nothing more then to hold him close and promise him that we could be. These feelings that I developed for my best friend were different but exhilarating. They were beautiful and possibly the strongest thing ever in my life and I clung close to them, knowing I wouldn't let go. I was finally the person that made him smile.

I watched as he crouched into the sand, his face close to the ground examining shells. I smiled and walked behind him, kicking sand on his ass. He protested, shaking himself clean, and then picked up the huge conch shell that he said he found wedged into the wet sand. We looked at it under the moonlight and he brushed it clean, saying he was going to give it to his mom. I knew she would love it, just like she loved her sweet baby, my sweet baby.

The sky darkened and I noticed that the waves were getting strong, the tide coming in thick. Water sprayed the hem of our jeans, the inside of our shoes, causing Eric to squeal. I concealed my laughter as we watched the water dance with the sand and I told him how beautifully tragic I found it.

"How can something be beautiful and tragic at the same time, Hyde?" I smiled at the way he always asked me questions, and I was reminded of the day when we were 11, sitting under his bed, flipping through a Playboy. I remember him asking me what everything was, how everything worked, and I unabashedly told him.

"It just is and that's what's beautiful. You don't need to describe it or read a book about it; you just know." I pulled his face towards me and kissed his lips sweetly, telling him we were tragically beautiful until the end of the world.

The sky above swirled with the colours of grey and black and soon flashing lights. Water fell as tears from the sky's eyes and I felt Eric shaking himself dry. "I thought you said it doesn't' do this here!" he shouted over the thunder and water and lightening and splashing of waves. I shrugged. "Maybe it's hurricane season," I offered and he cringed in fear. "Hyde, I want to leave," he said, a note of hysteria in his voice and I remembered that my beautiful darling was afraid of anything that had the potential to destroy, besides the Death Star from Star Wars.

I grabbed his hand as rain spilled onto our skin, our clothes and hair plastered to us. He slipped on the hill of sand, dirt turning into mud on his clothes and he let out a cry of despair, glaring when I laughed. I pulled him up and we ran to the car and I cringed as our wet asses squelched on top the clean leather. He told me to hurry up to the hotel, saying how he didn't want to be inside of a hurricane, but I promised to make sweet love to him if we were and maybe we'd land in Oz with little Munchkins.

"Dorothy got to Oz in a tornado," he pointed out. "How would you know, you cower in fear every time we watch the damn movie?" He glared, I laughed, and the car fought its way through wind and water.

xxx

I traced patterns on his pale stomach as we lay together in the hotel bed, the trees thrashing about outside. He squirmed and I felt goose bumps rising on his skin so I kissed them and pulled his shirt back down. He coughed and I threatened to kick his ass if he got a cold.

"You wouldn't take care of me?" he asked, looking up at me with honey eyes which I kissed. "Yes I would." He curled into my side, shivering with cold. I kissed his hair, telling him to sit tight while I turned the heater on. He fumbled with the knob on the radio and I with the thermostat.

We curled back together, the crappy heater rattling, but warm air pulsing through the vents. I felt his warm breath against my neck. The night was getting old, but we didn't care. We talked about everything, we talked until the earth gave in, we talked until my throat was dry. The radio whispered quietly between our comfortable silences while we gathered our thoughts, prompting new conversations.

The clock struck four and I felt his breathing thicken his chest rise and fall sweetly. "Beautiful boy, darling boy…"

John Lennon always said the right things.

* * *

It felt like Christmas morning every morning waking up next to him. Our innocence was beautiful, almost as gorgeous as the way his eyelids fluttered open, looking lazily down at me, heavy with sleep. I kissed his face all over, sliding my fingers between his, resting my chin on his chest as we spoke of our plans for the day.

He wanted to take me to a beach city where tourists and beach bums alike stayed. He wanted to show me everything he could, explain everything he knew. I knew he was excited and that only thrilled me more. Hyde was barely ever anxious about anything but when he was, his eyes glinted, his smile was huge, and I could almost always hear his heartbeat pounding in anticipation.

While my lovely dear showered I lit up a cigarette, leaning back in a chair like the hot shot I knew I wasn't. To prove my point, I fell backward, my head hitting hard against the floor. I stood up, coughing and rubbing my head, brushing the black ashes off my bare chest. I blushed even though no one else was around because that's just who I was, and finished the light, pounding the butt in a crystal ashtray.

After lazing around, I finally pulled a polo over my head and jeans on my hips, slipping Adidas' on my feet comfortably. Sweetie comes out from his shower, his springy hair dripping wet, wearing a comfortable tee and jeans. We pack up our jeans with cigarettes, lighters, and money and close the hotel up, throwing the key card in our pockets also. The sky was still slightly dreary from last nights rage and water dripped from the roofs, plopping gently on our hair.

He drives this time, saving me the embarrassment of getting lost and I clamber into the passenger seat, bounding and excited for the trip. He tells me I'm cute, but that I should stop twitching because it makes him edgy.

He drove and I gazed out the window, taking in the land that I had never seen. It was beautiful, with the palm trees against the grey-blue sky. I felt him slide his fingers between mine and kiss my palm and I melted into a million pieces.

15 minutes later we got out of the car and began walking down the streets busy with people. Stores lined each side, with signs proclaiming their items inside. I made him take me to a comic book store and we rifled through bins for over an hour, finally purchasing some.

"Forman," he said as he walked, "there thousands of comic book stores back home; you need to see something new." And I nodded in agreement. So we walked around the corner and I gasped. In front of us sat this huge castle like building and the best part was that it was pink. He grinned at my excitement, and we crossed the street to get closer.** "**It's called the Don Cesar Beach Resort. My mom used to have a boyfriend who worked here and we'd stay in the rooms." I murmured my appreciation, looking up at the huge fortress in awe, wishing I had my camera.

"We can get you a postcard with it on the front," he said, laughing, as if reading my thoughts. "Can we go in?" I ask and he nodded, so we walked up the huge front steps and right through the front doors.

The inside was just as beautiful as the out. It looked as if it was meant for the royal, but ordinary people strolled through, some with kids some without. Lovers latched arms, gazing at the artwork on the walls, and phones rang while hotel attendants answered them. Hyde dragged me deeper into the building, pointing out an ice cream shop.

We walked in and they had flavours of every kind, flavours I knew not even Fez had heard of. "Dude," I nearly shouted, jamming my finger against the glass, "they have Superman ice cream." I don't think he could help but kiss my nose and the man behind the counter gave us quite a dirty look, so I linked my fingers with Hyde's and he grinned broadly.

While he ordered, I gazed out the windows, noticing they had the beach right in its backyard. I pointed it out to him and though he all ready knew, he shared my enthusiasm. The man handed us our cones and I all but dragged him out the back door into the sand. People gave us weird looks but we didn't care and we sat on the stone wall, eating our frozen foods happily.

"I'm so happy you brought me here," I said, looking out across the ocean. "I'm glad you came," he kissed me gently. "Maybe one day we could move down here." I looked at him in surprise and his face reddened. "I mean, I don't know, maybe one day."

I smiled really wide and felt my cone drop out of my fingers as I pulled his face to me and kissed the hell out of him.

Reviews?


	5. Authors Note

A/N: Hey guys! I wonder if I still have any readers. I kind of abandon this. On accident, of course. But I found it yesterday and I remembered how much I loved writing it. So hopefully this weekend I'm going to type up a new chapter and post it. Please leave a comment if you're still reading, I love the support. Thanks for sticking around;

-oversizedchanel


	6. Spinning

A/N: Hey! Here is the new promised chapter. Not the best and not too long. I wanted to post it tonight so I tried to tie it up. Hopefully a new chapter this week. Reviews!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Jack's Mannequin.

I can't remember when the earth turned slowly  
So I just waited with the lights turned out again  
I lost my place but I can't stop this story  
I've found my way, but until then  
I'm only spinning- "Spinning- Jack's Mannequin.

I stretched out, every limb in my body aching, my skin bright red from sun burn. I winced, turned onto my side, burying my face into the cool pillow. Hyde was in the shower, and though he asked, I declined to join him. He asked once before but I nervously refused. I didn't want to bore him, but why should we go so fast? I was new at this, didn't know how to do certain things and neither did he, no matter how cocky he was. I smiled at that because his grin always made me fly.

I rolled onto my back, looking up at the stained ceiling. I thought about Donna for the first time since Hyde and I got together. She would be furious, if we were together or not. And how would my parents react? Jackie would have a fit. God, I hadn't thought about this.

Sighing, I picked the phone up and balanced it between my shoulder and ear as I turned the dial. Mom made me promise to call her every few days and we hadn't spoken since Wednesday and it was now Sunday.

The phone rang and almost immediately a rushed voice picked up. "Donna?" I asked, sitting up, surprised. I heard a shout of relief. "Eric, Eric it's you! Oh my God, we've been so worried!" I swung my legs over the side of the bed, brow furrowed. "Why, I just called my mom a few days ago." I knew she was paranoid but God I was 18, almost 19.

"No, Eric, something awful has happened, you've got to come home." I felt my heart pound and I gripped the phone tighter, my knuckles turning white. I heard the shower squeak off and the curtain pull back. "Donna what happened?" The door opened and Hyde padded out, dripping wet. I glanced up at him.

"Eric, Red had another heart attack. They're at the hospital right now, it happened almost an hour ago. They told me to stay by the phones if you called." The colour drained from my face and I felt Hyde next to me, his hand on his shoulder, shaking me slightly. "What happened?" he mouthed. My teeth merely chattered nervously.

"H-how serious is it?" I was nervous for the answer. "I dunno worse then the last one. Eric you need to get back here." I noted the panic in her voice and nodded numbly. Realising she couldn't hear me I said, "A-all right, we'll be home soon." The phone somehow returned to its cradle and I turned to Hyde. "Dude what's wrong?"

"Red had another heart attack. We have to leave. Now." I jumped up and began throwing clothes in my bag, my chest aching as the heart beneath it raced and fear pumped through every vein. I heard Hyde sigh behind me and I spun around. "Are you coming?" I snapped, not wanting to waste a second.

He looked crestfallen and shrugged. "Hyde!" I shouted, furious that he didn't understand how serious this was, "he could fucking die, OK?! I'm sorry that our trip was cut short but this is my dad, all right, and I need to be there!"

He stepped back, eyebrows raised, hands held up in defense. "Hey, sorry, I just…" He raked a hand through his hand, "I got a room for us at the Don CeSar tonight, but if we have to leave we'll just… forget it." He gave me a small reassuring smile and started picking out a pair of jeans. "Y-you got us a room?" I was pleased, flattered, and kind of uneasy. Why was he pushing me like this?

"Yeah, I figured you could suck me off in a place that doesn't have paper thin walls, you know?" He had a wicked grin on his face and my eyes widened. "And they had a coloured TV so we could watch Spiderman cartoons. I'm only kidding Forman." I sighed and walked over to him, taking his hand and turning him around. "I'm sorry," I said slightly exasperated. "I just can't believe it happened, again." He kissed me and I felt his wet face press against me. I wrapped my arms around him, getting shower water on me and not caring. I pulled away and pressed my face against his shoulder.

"Come on, we should get going. We can probably leave tonight." I nodded and walked into the bathroom to clean out our toothbrushes. I heard him drop onto the bed and call the hotel, canceling his reservations.

Once this was all over, I decided, I would suck him off in the middle of the street if that's what his sick heart desired.

xxx

The night befell us as we pulled out of the hotel parking lot and I once again apologized. "I'm going to punch you if you say sorry one more time. Your dad just had a heart attack, it's OK, I understand. I would go back even if you weren't with me."

"Really?" I asked, intrigued. He glared, inquiring if we were playing 20 questions again. I only shrugged.

Brushing me off, he turned the radio on and The Rolling Stones began playing. I leaned into the seat, tired but not able to sleep. Hyde said he would drive through the night and I could take over in the morning. I was thankful for this, not sure I could trust myself to drive in this state. I was shaky and scared and I thought I would vomit all over the dashboard.

I started considering reasons as to why he would have gotten another heart attack? High blood pressure? Laurie got pregnant? The possibilities were endless. I was only glad I wasn't the reason for it.

"Hyde?" I asked after a moment. "How are we going to tell everyone about… us?" I saw him bite the inside of his lip and consider. "I… dunno. I thought about it a little but I mean, now this changes everything. I think us coming out to Red will just make things a lot worse." I nodded, knowing he was right. "Maybe we'll wait a few months until things settle down and we'll tell people."

I must have still looked worried so he smiled reassuringly. "It'll be all right, ok? I promise." And I believed him. I always did and I'm pretty sure I always would. He was a liar and I knew it. He could lie through his teeth and wouldn't turn back; I'd seen him at it a million times. But he never did to me. Even before this trip. He covered it up with "I'm fine" or a grim smile. It was nice knowing that he was always honest with me. At least someone in my life was.

I wanted to apologize again for ruining his darling plans. But I knew it wouldn't make him feel better. It didn't take much to hurt Hyde, I was noticing. He may cover his pain up, but it was still there. And I realized that I had caused a lot of it. "Hey, princess, hand me the cigarettes." His gruff voice brought me out of my thoughts and I looked over at him. "Huh? Oh, sure." I pulled the glove compartment open, grabbing the Marb Reds and lighting one for him. My fingers jittered and I figured I might as well light one for myself also.

"Are you nervous?" he asked me after a few moments of silence. I looked at him, wanting to cover up my own pain like he did. "Deathly scared," I admitted, leaning into the seat. Hyde put a heavy hand on the back of my neck. "It's going to be fine," he said once again. And once again, I believed him.

I was watching his sleeping chest rise and fall from the corner of my eye. I was watching the way he would shift, his hair rumpling up in the back. I was watching how comfortable he looked and I knew that if I were to be closer, I would feel his warmth, smell his familiar smell. Sometimes it scared me at how quickly we fell together, so peacefully, so perfectly. But when he smiled or laughed or blinked his eyes in that heavy, sleepy way, I wasn't scared anymore. He'd wiped away my fears from the day we met; I had just never realized it. God, did I love him.

It was nearing 9. He hadn't gotten much sleep. I noticed the way he would nervously shake his leg, tap his fingers, swallow hard. I didn't blame him; I was just as scared as he was. We didn't know what would await us when we got home. I had to keep telling him it would be OK. Maybe I could make it that way. "Hyde?" I looked over at him, seeing him yawn and wipe sleep from his eyes. "Morning," I greeted, trying not to sound painfully exhausted. I would drive straight through if he wanted me to.

We were half way through Georgia. We weren't going fast enough for him, I knew it was true. We'd be back by the end of the week though. "Why don't we stop off at a payphone?" I offered carefully, beginning to pull off the highway. He nodded, sighing. "Yeah, that's fine." I felt awful for him as I pulled into a gas station, seeing his fingers knot nervously together. "Here," I mumbled, pulling a hand full of coins from my pocket, dropping them gently into his hands. His face looked green as he slid out of the car, slowly making his way to the pay phone.

I watched him push the coins in, dialing the familiar number, and press the phone against his ear. He began talking, nodding his head, leaning exasperatedly against the stone wall. As soon as the phone sat on its cradle ten minutes later, I all ready knew he was going to dive into the trash can, his body rejecting food and bile. I only watched his thin shoulders shake, his lanky legs carefully make his way back to me. He politely opened the car door, slipping inside once more. "It doesn't sound good," he managed to croak. And his eyes were wet.

Things aren't going too good.


	7. I Want To Hold Your Hand

[A/N; Sorry for the wait. Hope you enjoy it. As we get into the holidays, I'll have more interesting posts.]

Oh yeah, I´ll tell you something  
I think you´ll understand  
When I say that something  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand

Oh, please, say to me  
You´ll let me be your man  
and please, say to me

You´ll let me hold your hand  
Now let me hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand

My heart jolted painfully four days later as we pulled into the driveway of the house. The Vista Cruiser was there, Kelso's car was there. It had probably been there since it happened. We hadn't been. I've been trying not to make myself guilty. We didn't know this was coming; no one did. But it had and now I had to face it. And I would. With Hyde next to me.

He gripped my fingers gently as he pulled the keys out of the ignition. "It's going to be fine." I tried my best to believe him like I had all those times before but I was paranoid, at the moment, thinking of various horrible things that could have happened. He squeezed my hand again, knowing what I was thinking. But at that moment, I heard footsteps and my hand was lying alone in my lap. I was nervous about people catching us. I was nervous for the day I would have to tell people. There were so many things to be nervous and frightened about, though, that I wasn't going to think four months into the future.

Donna's face was in my window a few seconds later. I didn't think of the anger from a few weeks ago. As soon as I got out of the car, she was in my arms and I didn't deny how comfortable it felt. She didn't waste time though, grabbing my hand. "Come on. Your mom's inside, she'll want to see you." Donna pulled me through the driveway, Hyde following slowly behind. I walked through the sliding door, just like I had done for so many years, and was greeted by my mother's arms wrapped painfully tight around my waist. Usually I resisted these, but I kissed her head, remembering her smell.

We'd only been gone two weeks and I had missed her so much.

"Oh honey, you're home!" She held my face, as if checking into my eyes, making sure it was still me. When she was satisfied, she turned to Hyde, doing the same. I noticed he didn't resist. And normally I would have smirked at that, but I didn't think my mouth could turn upward anymore. And as I looked around the room, I don't think anyone else's could either. Kelso sat at the table, his arms crossed on the table. He gave me a small smile, not the usual Kelso smile. And when I looked over at Fez, I found him giving Jackie reassuring kisses on the forehead. And she was giving Hyde nervous looks.

He didn't seem to care. Or notice. "Did anything happen?" he asked after Mom had let go. She shook her head. "No. He's not getting better, but he's not getting any worse." We all sat in this statement. The clouds suddenly seemed much darker. "I want to see him," I managed to say through a tight throat.

xxx

15 minutes later I sat in the parking lot in the El Camino with Hyde. I felt him move next to me, pressing his mouth casually on my jaw. I shivered, kissing his hair as he sat there momentarily. "Come on," he breathed and we got out of the car. The parking lot was nearly empty; the sky was dark with 9 PM. My body felt exhausted but nervousness was building in the pit of my stomach as I walked through the doors of the community hospital, Hyde walking behind me. I didn't know what I would see. I didn't know what I should expect at this point.

Hyde dealt with getting us signed in and even linked his finger with mine as we walked down the hall. It was so quiet and my heart was hammering so hard, I was sure he could hear it. "609." We stopped and he turned to face me. "You can go in first," he said and I nodded. "You'll be fine," he added when I didn't move. I didn't care who was watching. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my mouth against it. I could feel him hesitate against me, but soon felt his arms around my waist. "It'll be fine," he said for probably the 100th that day, nibbling on my ear before shoving me off.

Hyde gave a small grin, pushing the door of the room open. Swallowing hard, I stepped inside and heard it click behind me, a painful noise. The room was dim. I noticed that the TV had been turned to a game show. I knew Red hated game shows, though, so I flipped it onto a baseball game. I still hadn't looked at him. The flowers in the vase next to him were flopped to the side. I attempted to straighten them. I smoothed out the bottom of the blanket near his feet. I didn't look at him.

But then he shifted and I forced my eyes up. "Dad?" I managed to breath, my chest aching. His eyes were open to slits. He had tubes and his face was pale, not the usual red. He made a noise in his throat so I sat on the chair next to him, looking intently into the man's face. "Are you all right? Do you need anything?" His fingers twitched, palms up, and I immediately grabbed them gently. "It's ok," I promised soothingly. "How was… Florida?" he croaked. I could barely hear him. "It was all right. I… you would like it."

He managed a smile through lips I knew were dry. He couldn't talk much; I was surprised he was awake. From the sound of it, he had been passed out on meds or just exhaustion when the rest of the family was around. "Dad, I'm sorry I'm not the best son," I said suddenly. And all those years of letting him down and disobeying him and disrespecting him… they unexpectedly hit me; I felt winded. His eyelids fell shut but he squeezed my hand to let me know he was listening. "I know I'm not as tough as you would like. I know it's like having another daughter." I swallowed, thinking of Hyde and I. "But it's who I am. And I'm trying," I promised, "I really am."

His lids lifted slightly and he shook his head, giving me an assuring smile. "I love you," he managed to say. I sat there in awe, gripping his hand as the door opened and a skinny nurse came in. "Oh! Mr. Foreman, you're awake," she said excitedly. "I was just about to give you another sedative." I looked at my dad a moment then up at the nurse. "Sedative? You mean he's hopped up right now?" Red had a small silly looking grin on his face. Again? The only time my father said he loved me was when he was on drugs.

But I smiled, knowing he did mean it either way. I let go of his fingers as the nurse told me Mr. Foreman should probably get some rest and to please come back tomorrow. I left my dad in the care of the nurse, walking back into the hallway and shutting the door behind me. Hyde sat on the floor, leaned up sleepily against the wall. He looked up at me, blinking away exhaustion. "He's fine," I said, sitting next to him. He grinned, patting my knee.

"Everything's going to be fine."

* * *

[Seeing as I started this fic in summer, I kind of want to keep it up with current seasons. So I'm skipping a month or so ahead, if you all don't mind.]

I felt Eric shiver next to me, pulling his sweater tighter around him. I grinned, my own fingers quite cold, gripping his as we sat in front of the TV in the basement. It had been nearly two months since Red's heart attack. He had slowly made his way into recovery, but was still a bit wobbly at times and didn't perform his usual household chores. But the doctor said that by the New Year, he would be fine. I had never realized how much Eric loved his dad until that day at the hospital. I had let him go on forever about all the times they had actually had fun together as he lay next to me in my cot at midnight. He knew his dad would get better and he was right.

It was a few weeks into November, Thanksgiving creeping up on us. In January, Eric would be starting classes at a community college and I… I didn't know. Grooves was still in my possession. I had a good income coming in and a large savings account all ready growing. I knew that hopefully, in a year or so, I would be able to move out of the Foreman's and, hopefully with Eric, start living in an apartment. I hadn't talked too much about our future together, but I could tell it was ours to share. And I liked that security. With Jackie, I had never known what was going to happen. But with Eric, I like the idea of settling down, of planning the future.

He curled into my side, resting his head on my chest. It had begun growing colder and we both loved it. No one knew about 'us' yet. And I wasn't sure when they would. Part of me wanted to tell people before Christmas, but I knew they wouldn't be OK with it. And I could never ruin Christmas for them. Soon, though, because it was driving Eric insane. Soon, though, because it was driving me insane.

"Hyde?" Eric was saying my name. I pulled my eyes away from the TV I wasn't really watching and looked down at him. "Hm?" I saw him searching my expression before grinning goofily. "Nothin'." I leaned down, pressing my cold lips to his. I felt his warm tongue pushed through, filling my mouth as it roamed. His body was shaking from cold and I felt myself falling over him. And I felt suddenly… nervous. We had never actually gotten this far. And I had been OK with it. It wasn't that I hadn't wanted more, but I liked just being cute with him. I had decided that's what we were, even though no one else could see.

His fingers gripped at my shirt, his body pushing further into mine, his mouth moving quite fast. My fingers held his face and they pressed together, as close as they could. I could hear his breathing, hear his heart beating. And I liked how close we were; I liked how comfortable this felt… "Eric- OH MY GOD!"

I fell backward off of my skinny boy toy, as if receiving an electric shock. Eric pulled himself up, looking wildly around, his hair rumpled. And looking at the flight of stairs, we saw Laurie, staring at us in wonderment. She walked slowly towards us and I could see her swallow hard, dropping down onto my usually occupied chair. Her pale eyes still drilled into her brother, then slowly to me. "Were you two just…"

I looked at Eric nervously but he ignored me, his gaze still on Laurie's. He nodded and I saw his fingers shaking with fear. "Oh… my… God," she said again. "Do… Do mom and dad know?" She was still speaking to him. He shook his head. And then, to my amazement, she started laughing. And it wasn't her usual evil, 'I'm so ratting you out' laugh. It was happy? She flew past me, wrapping her arms around Eric. "OH MY GOD! I HAVE A GAY BROTHER!" "SHHHHH!" But he was laughing into her shoulder, hugging her back, looking slightly perplexed. She turned to me and I knew what was coming. Before I could duck out of it, she gripped me in a hug. "I'm so happy for you!" she breathed, nearly crying, before pulling back and beaming at us.

"Where's Laurie at?" Eric asked after a moment. The girl sighed, shrugging. "I dunno. I expected to come down here and insult you a little bit, but…" She grinned real wide once more. "When are you telling people?" Eric looked at me nervously and I shrugged. "Aw. What a great Christmas present you could give Daddy!" "NO!" Laurie laughed again. "I'm kidding. But you really should tell Kelso and Fez and them." He gave a laugh. "Yeah. I'm sure Donna would love that. 'Hey, after we broke up I hooked up with my best guy friend.' That'll go over well." But Laurie's spirits wouldn't be dampened. "Well, it shouldn't surprise her."

"And here come the insults."

* * *

We lay real still, allowing the late fall almost winter breeze that drips into the basement to drift over us. "Well, one person knows," I said carefully after a moment, looking over at Hyde in the corner of my eye. He sighed, turning to face me. "Yeah. Weird that it's Laurie. Wonder why she's not telling your parents." I shrugged, curious about the same thing. "I dunno. Maybe… she did know." I had been thinking about this lately. Maybe this was why I was always getting into ruts with Donna; maybe I've always been gay I just didn't realize it. "That you were gay?" he asked and I nodded. "Foreman, it's all right. Time with Donna wasn't wasted, all right? You did love her, don't doubt that." "Just like you loved Jackie," I added slowly. He hesitated. "Sure."

Silence fell over us again and I felt him grab my fingers. I leaned comfortably into his shoulder, our bodies slightly uncomfortable on his small cot. "I love you, Hyde," I said quietly. "I know-" "I know you know," I interrupted, looking at him. "I'm just telling you." He pulled a face at which I laughed. It was still slightly surreal to me. I didn't understand how I could be here right now with Hyde, like this, and love every second of it. I heard him humming under his breath. He would do this every night, I noticed. Or when we were in the car. Or at dinner. Tonight it was the Beatles. He did a variation. I even heard the Styx once.

"Aw. I want to hold your hand too, Steven," I teased, kissing his face. He flushed, muttering darkly. "Whatever." He turned his back to me and I grinned wide. He still hummed. "Say it back!" I squealed, wrapping my arms around his waist and squeezing. He grunted. "God, Foreman," he managed to say, "I can't lay a finger on you but you find it necessary to break me in two." I laughed, burying my face in the back of his shoulder. "Yeah. But you have to say it back." "Not when you make me," he protested. It was my turn to mutter under my breath.

"Goodnight, Eric." "Night, Hyde."

---


End file.
